Is the problem this one t-shirt, or the fact that she's allowed to run free with her young breasts sticking out distracting everyone? If this t-shirt is a departure from her usual attire, I promise you she got the message when LW drooled all over her and told her he was thinking about her vagina. If he keeps drooling, she'll get ever more modest, until such time as those luscious mounds aren't on view enough to distract him anymore. Oh, happy day!

Or LW could just move to Afghanistan, where women know how to dress.

I hadn't thought about this in decades.

When I was about 20, I was playing in an opera orchestra in Europe. (No dress codes, except for performances.) I was a rabid anglophile, and adored my London Underground map t-shirt. Once when I was wearing it, a singer more than twice my age came up leering, said he wanted to "visit Picadilly" and tweaked my nipple. I was disgusted, but everyone told me "German men are just like that." I don't think I wore it again. Yuck.

Doesn't your heart go out to these women, and all the others named for their vaginas? It must be almot as bad as having to go through life named Dick Armey or Dick Cheney.

"It's very simple. KITTY = PUSSY, VAGINA"

Yeah, and the next time Dick Cheney meets a world leader he can wear a t-shirt that says DICK = COCK, PENIS.

I'm not exactly clear on what point you're trying to make here. You're saying you truly can't imagine the word "kitty" in any other context? Poor Kitty Carlisle is rolling in her grave.

I grant you that a woman who wore a t-shirt that read "KITTY = PUSSY, VAGINA" would get unwanted attention. Just as you would if you wore a shirt reading "MY PENIS IS FLACCID AND MICROSCOPIC". But why would she or you want to wear such a shirt? But, hey, whatever floats your boat.

Nobody's going to read what you wrote (except me), but thank you for weighing in. You made a point hundreds (!) of people before you tried to make, but you made it better. There are obscene t-shirts out there. (I once saw a woman wearing a Nike parody t-shirt with the caption "Just Do Me" and my sister saw a woman wearing a "Jump my bones!" t-shirt once.) This kitty one just doesn't happen to have been one of them.

Others have already made this point, but can we please stop making this false distinction between physical and "emotional" affairs? If someone's giving her orgasms, and she's giving them to him, it's sexual. Even if it's "just" over the phone. When you really want to get in the gutter with someone and betray someone else, phone sex can be just the ticket -- it just feels so darn dirty. Just ask Bill "Loofah" O'Reilly.

I reluctantly got a cell phone when I was pregnant and driving at night in iffy weather. I got a special plan that was free, but each call was expensive. It was for emergencies only. Guess what? I never had an emergency! Never used it even once.

I have since come to the conclusion that not being instantly reachable by clients who think I should be on call 24/7 is a luxury these days, and one I will not give up lightly. True, I can't call up my husband from the grocery store to jabber about what brand of peanut butter I should buy, as so many others seem compelled to do, but it's a small price to pay.

When I was getting my MBA, I had a fancy-schmancy internship at a company you've all heard of, during the course of which I had one-on-one meetings with everyone in the organization from VP up to Chairman of the Board. At the lower rungs, they didn't hesitate to interrupt our conversation to answer the phone, out of a pathetic fear that if they didn't answer every call someone else would do their job for them, maybe better. The higher up I got, the more likely they wouldn't answer, and figure whoever it was would try again. At the very tippy-top, the Chairman told his lovely assistant to hold all his calls. For a pathetic little intern. That's power.

I learned my lesson, although it may not have been the one most of them were trying to teach me. Now I'm my own boss, and one of the glories of it is not having to answer the phone when it's not convenient. If you have to stay wired to your job 24 hours a day, you have my sympathy. But there is another way.

I thought the adjectival form of Venus was "venereal". I wonder why he doesn't use that word...

I have that on my car! I have never gotten such a reaction from a bumper sticker. People are constantly asking me where I got it. (www.goats.com)

Nu?

The older ones were just sweepers. Have they added a vacuuming feature?

I don't think that word means what you think it means.

I have a different perspective on this. My string quartet plays a TON of weddings, and newborns are not the disruptive ones. They pretty much just sleep and eat. If they make noise, you take them away. They stay where you put them. They often serve as a welcome reminder of what may be the next big life stage for the Happy Couple. I've never, in the literally hundreds of weddings I've participated in, seen one spoiled by a newborn's presence.

Toddlers are a TOTALLY different story.