@ redshooz

I am not sure that older women are so much as threatened by the beauty of their younger sisters as much as frustrated that the depth and richness of emotion, intelligence, wit, imagination that are developed, by both men and women as they mature, are largely ignored by our male peers and society at large.

I am far more interesting now, and not only excited by life but know how to get a lot from it - than I was when I was 18. I was young and had all the fresh parts and was wide eyed, but I was ignorant. Looking back - I would never have wasted so much energy wondering if I look "okay", and I would have swallowed life whole, instead of taking all those tentative nibbles. But I was simple then - much more complex now and my life reflects it.

But, yeah, I was noticed by men more then than now. But it was not for anything that I had earned, or created, or worked for. I was just a young female.

As far as physical beauty go - men are far more physcially appealing when they are younger too. Flesh is firm and muscly - not slack and flabby - harder to keep muscles when you get older - just a fact of life no matter hard you work out. Hair is all there, teeth are white and frankly young men are always ready for sex.

But I find most men that age, expecially the "pretty" ones, to be dull and having little imagination. They seem to worry more about impressing each other. I am bored by them.

For the most part - women of that age are equally boring, but men seem not to care. I think that is what is frustrating (or threatening?) but only if you want to have a relationship with a male peer, have a companion to share life with. It is as if women are pregressing through life only to realise that the men they started out with, have got stuck in the past.

I think you see a lot of women "of a certain age" give up on men, not because they can't find someone, but because those someones are far more work and impact self esteem in a way that it becomes not worth it. There is so much more in life than worrying if you are looking "hot" enough for men who are now of the viagra age.

I admire the ability pretty young things have to garner such attention from men. It does make men look a little silly though.

But as far as power goes? Rare is the young beautiful thing that has enough knowledge, personal and of the world, to work that fleeting and epherical power into something where she is really in control.

I supposed easy access to cheap birth control is out of the question, eh?

What a dweeb. Why not pay poor men for vasectomies while he's at it?

You drive a corvette, now don't you Redshooz!

And so the dichotomy continues . . . .

I do believe that anyone who advocates women get operated on, should be also advocating men be operated on.

While I was unaware that LaBruzzo was interested in vasectomies as well, I am just as outraged that some politician, some sucker at the tax payer teat, advocated medical surgeries for people because they are poor - which probably is code for non-white.

As far as the surgeries go, one requires general anethesia and one is done in the doctor's office as an out patient surgery. Both are uncomfortable and unpleasant as only surgery can be.

LW - call up your boyfriend and let him know how you feel. My guess is he will change it around so that you feel that you are the suspect one, but stick to the fact that you are RIGHT to feel the way you do.

Spending time with someone of the opposite gender, who is going through an emotional breakup? Well - I can see having lunch, dinner, an afternoon walking about and talking.

IF and I do mean IF the friendship is established to begin with. But your bf met this person on myspace. And now he is going to spend a whole week - at her home?

When you call your bf, do insist on talking to his friend. Introduce your self and do tell her the situation makes you uncomfortable. If her intentions are innocent, she will empathize. If not, she will be snotty. My guess is that your bf won't want you to talk to his "other" friend.

He is shopping.

I am sorry you are in the midst of this, but get out now. Any time and money you have invested in this relationship? You are only going to throw more down the rabbit hole if you delay a break up.

If he moved in with you, then you were able to afford the apartment without him. Pack his stuff up and either put it in storage so you don't have to deal with him when he gets his things, or just box it up at the apartment and steal yourself for the inevitable emothional storm.