Dear LW,

I think that people having been giving a lot of very good, thoughtful advice. I understand the overwhelming advice to dump and divorce her, however, there is a rule of thumb about making huge, life-changing decisions in the midst of a crisis-- they should be avoided if possible.

I'm writing this to you as a fellow lesbian in an 8-year relationship. That means I know the additional pressure we put on ourselves to be a "perfect" model of how great same-sex relationships can be, that we often feel that people might be looking at us with a more critical eye than straight relationships. I don't know what I would do in your situation except for one thing-- I'd hold off making any decisions at the moment.

There is no denying that you are in the middle of what is probably be the biggest personal crisis you've ever had in your life. It makes total sense that you have an overwhelming desire to distance yourself from it all as quickly as possible, to move quickly and try to start over with a clean slate. But that is exactly why you need to stop and take a deep breath, to slow down and take things one step at a time. If not just for you but for your child as well.

I can't help but feel that you're seriously bottling things up right now. You seem to have the level-headed eloquence of someone who, mid-crisis, has shut down their emotions to protect themselves. You sound like someone who is describing events as though they are happening to someone else-- you sound seriously detached, which is a perfectly normal defense mechanism in a time of crisis.

Take into account that you are in shock and are overwhelmed by everything that has happened lately. (If you feel that you aren't then that proves that you are in deep denial.) Realize that you might not know how you're going to feel about the situation-- or your wife-- in a month, 2 months, 3 months or more.

Considering that you wrote a letter to an advice columnist it also strikes me that you need to find someone to talk to-- you need support no matter what happens, whether you stay or go. Additionally, giving the situation a little time doesn't mean that you have to keep things bottled up in the meantime. Let your parents know that you're not sure your marriage will survive this-- tell them what you've told all of us. At the right time you need to let your partner know this is as well, that she has deeply betrayed your trust in ways that you might not be able to get over. Don't go through the motions, let the people closest to you know how you feel, that you are thinking that this might be the end. I bet they will understand.

Waiting a little doesn't mean you won't come to the same conclusion a little later, however, even the way you posed the issue-- that you're worring that others will disapprove of you if you decided to leave her now-- means that you might be worried that you'll feel that way about yourself down the road. That you abandoned her when she needed you most. You need to do this in a way that preserves your own self respect and who you are as a person.

My best to you, I hope you get all the help and support that you and your child need.

For such a thoughtful, heartfelt and honest essay about the trials and challenges of trying to become a parent. Although I hope you're prepared for the onslaught of nasty letters you're going to get for being so honest about such difficult, complex subject matter.

I was feeling really despondent earlier today, in the wake of what was basically the MSM making a mountain out of a molehill and doing the GOP's job for them by framing Hillary v. Obama as Gender v. Race. Thank goodness Hillary and Obama made it clear that there is no animus between them, that they are ON THE SAME TEAM, that they respect each other and are happy to work together.

I've been feeling pretty sickened by the absurd Gender v. Race war framing-- of which Salon is totally guilty of buying into-- and I'm hoping that they successfull killed it tonight. They were all great, smart and level-headed despite the embarassing number of attempts the MSM talking heads tried to bait them into attacking each other.

In the end who was caught trying to play the so-called Race Card? THE MEDIA.

I too am totally addicted. When I first saw ads for it I thought that HBO had finally jumped the shark with the therapy subject, especially since the ads for "In Treatment" ran during "Tell Me That You Love Me." Then I watched the first episode and by the end of the first week I was hooked. It has it all-- amazing characters, wonderful acting, excellent writing as well as the brief, intense flavor of the episodes.

While the Amy storyline and Paul's unraveling personal life are fascinating, I actually find Wednesdays to be the most compelling. Sophie really captures the borderline messed up teenage perspective in a way that I've never seen captured on film.

Thankfully I can watch the episodes whenever because of Comcast's "On Demand" feature-- which for some reason releases all of the episodes for the week on Mondays.

Beautifully done. Actually reminded me a bit of the equally satisfying Six Feet Under finale.

The series can be summed up pretty simply, and it goes a little like this:

what come around goes around, then it goes around again and again and again...

While it's obviously a bit on the sad and pessimistic side it's also a testament to the human condition. We need do to believe we can change things or we'd never try...