Letters to the Editor
Laurel962
Published Letters: 486 Editor's Choice: 37
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If Darwin were alive, he'd be ROTFLHAO
[Read the article: The artful seducer]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Cuz it's hilarious when morons co-opt what they think is "Social Darwinism" or evolutionary biology or evo-psych to justify what is basically just dumb-ass, juvenile behavior.
It was a sorry day in the world of glib psycho-babble when evolutionary philosophy joined hands with mass media and general stupidity to produce stuff like "all anybody wants is self-replication" and "big breasts demonstrate reproductive fitness". But that's what we get for being a society that lives on sound-bites, instead of actually reading books or thinking for ourselves.
I think it is no more likely that Mr. Markovik is having all this "success" (if indeed that's what one-night stands with strangers is) with women than I think that people are out there buying repo'd houses for $400 and then flipping them for $400,000. What? It's not true? But I just saw an infomerical on TV that said exactly this! Did it occur to any of the brainiacs posting here that Mr. Markovik is just making this shit up, because he knows it will sell for $$$$ to lonely, fat, balding guys who want to get laid? That magicians use paid helpers in their audiences to do things like "read minds", so why not hire a few pretty girls to pretend to be your dupes in bizarre seduction schemes?
I don't believe for a second that there is an attractive adult woman drunk enough to go home with a guy dressed in feathers, a silly hat and makeup, no matter how tall he is (though I know a number of gay men who quite definitely WOULD). That cannot possibly be anything that would lead to "reproductive fitness", not that I believe one-night stand pickups in bars are seriously intended for that purpose anyways.
Seriously though, these methods don't work and would be likely to get you maced if applied to any decent adult women with IQ's over 85 and in any social situations where the participants are remotely sober, such as 99% of all normal social interactions. Although to the young, drunk and stupid, it may seem that bars and clubs are the center of the social universe, anybody over 24 knows this is not at all true...it's an artificial environment that draws a certain type of person, and where people are often on their worst behavior and making the worst possible assumptions about each other. Really good, decent, intelligent men and women (the kind you might actually want to pair-bond with) are off doing other, far more interesting and important things with their time. Wanna meet one? Go somewhere other than a club.
BTW: not only is Markovik a lame poseur, but this kind of "Pick-up Artist" scam is older than the hills. I personally remember books and classes on this subject back in the 1960s and 70s! What IS interesting is how this is inevitably oriented to men -- no one in their right mind, apparently, believes that a fat, homely girl can pick up a handsome hottie guy by "pretend insulting" him! Gee, I wonder why?
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Do him a favor: tell him the truth
[Read the article: How can I help my friend get over losing his girlfriend?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]The truth is that relationships with huge age differences (no matter which sex is older or younger) don't usually work out over time. And the age difference is proportional -- 20 years doesn't mean as much if one person is 70 and the other is 90, but at 19 (when the girl met the LW's friend), this kind of age difference (and experience/maturity/intellect) is truly vast. Nobody over 30 should be dating a teenager - sorry. It's squicky and it's wrong, even if technically "legal".
Remember that this young woman got pregnant at FIFTEEN, had a baby at 16, probably dropped out of high school and isn't capable of caring for her own child, even seven years later. This isn't a mature woman of 23, with her head on straight...she's apparently not a college grad and I doubt she would have moved straight into her boyfriend's house at 19 if she had her own place.
If the boyfriend liked her child, and everything was so copacetic, why didn't the girl get full custody of her child back from her parents? I can understand them being legal guardians when she was 16 and a minor, but why is she incapable of caring for her child at TWENTY THREE? It's painfully obvious she is very immature. Maybe that's what the LW's friend liked about her -- that she was unworldy, unformed, vulnerable. That is not a basis for a healthy relationship.
He needs a girlfriend who is smart, mature, educated, worldly, intelligent and his equal -- more so than his exact age -- but you only get those qualities when you have lived some real life, and that takes time, which is why very few 19 year olds are like this. And people often make excuses ("she's really really mature for nineteen!") when they just want to shag someone who is very attractive. But it leads to just this situation -- long term hurt and pain.
And how good was this for the little kid? Anyone even think about the child in this matter? His mother can't take care of him, but brings him for "visits" to her boyfriend's house, starting when he is THREE. Presumably the boyfriend is the only father figure he knows (besides grandpa) -- and now he is out of the picture. That's horrible for a seven year old to have to deal with. Only a really immature, incompetent mother would even put her toddler child into this kind of situation.
Frankly, the middle-aged men I know who only wish to date teenagers have a few screws loose, and issues about the power and sophistication of adult women their own age, things they need to get over (like the LW's friend) before they can even dream of a successful mid-life relationship. Until the friend acknowledges this, he will just "rinse and repeat" this kind of dead end relationship until he's a pathetic old coot like the geezer who married Anna Nicole Smith.