Dear LW, although I can sympathize with your plight, the cold facts are that if it was really something you wanted to do, you'd already be doing it. Devoting one's self to a life of artistic pursuits requires some sacrifices, as Cary mentioned in his reply. Working in smoke-filled bars until the wee hours of the morning can be just as draining as working a day job, coming from someone who knows. And how lucky you are to have a husband and a baby! Sometimes the focus to establish an artistic career(while supporting yourself with a day job) comes at the expense of relationships. By all means, go after your dreams, whatever they may be, but like Cary says, there are costs involved, time and energy-wise.

Like other posters here, I occasionally volunteer at the soup kitchen run by my church. After spending the three or four hours helping to prepare, serve and clean up after the meal, I usually get hungry myself. In my experience however, there are NEVER any leftovers; every scrap of food is consumed by people who, not surprisingly, are probably a lot more nutritionally challenged than I am. There is ample opportunity to interact with the soup kitchen patrons as we are serving them, and it's there when we can catch up with the regulars and greet those we haven't seen before. Volunteering at all is a good thing, LW; you and your friends can follow your own hearts from there.

Gosh Garrison, you're funny: "eyebrows the size of sparrows..."

It certainly would be nice to think that the party who nominated W as the best they had to offer could fess up to this completely wrong turn; but that would require some accountability on their part. Who, me?

Unlike some other posters, I have actually seen the movie, and agree with Stephanie 100%. She's articulate, knowledgable about film history and took care to give credit to the director and cast for their considerable talents. Keep up the good work, SZ!

Perhaps Ms. Miller was referring to the well-known fact that Wagner's father, like Hitler's, was widely thought to be Jewish; which certainly would make his anti-semitism odd, if not farcical.

So, would the LW be more qualified to counsel couples if he/she had been married three times? By some of the logic exhibited here, that would make LW even more of an expert than their training and education already indicates. The LW seems to be in possesion of empathy, self-awareness and the aforementioned educational requirements. As for the dating thing, you're wise to be selective, and not just jump into any old relationship. When that right person comes along, they'll be lucky to have you.

Oh LW, what a beautifully eloquent letter, one that expresses what many of us are going through: the loss of a dream. Crying jags at work are not something I make a habit of, but I sure had one today. Cary's advice is right on; take time to mourn, grieve, heal yourselves. With such strong inner resources as you obviously have, you will absolutely be a blessing to those around you. In time, that new dream will come. There's a Joni Mitchell song that talks about that, 'The Circle Game': "There'll be new dreams, and better..." something like that. Anyway, thank you for sharing your story.

First of all, congratulations on the new job, LW. Hopefully things will work out better for you than with the graduate program. May I ask how you came to acquire three dogs? Even for people who are at home all day, three dogs is a major responsibility. As other posters have said, pets are quite like children in the amount of care they require; do you feel that, given your current situation, you can provide that care?

"We already had to pay several hundred dollars we didn't really have when we moved out of our last place because the carpet there was trashed, too."

Maybe the responsibility of caring for three dogs is a bit overwhelming right now. You're just starting a new job that you seem to feel good about. Concentrate on being successful there and establishing yourself. That might go a long way towards improving your outlook about things in general. Good luck,

If only there was some correlation between the two. I understand that Garrison has moved up in the world, leaving the Lutheranism of his upbringing for the Smells & Bells of the High Church and WASPdom. Wouldn’t it be great if all those “nice people” that fill the pews on Sunday mornings actually practiced the things that Jesus taught, instead of congratulating themselves on making the scene, hanging with the In Crowd? Belief is not so complicated; be kind, tread lightly on the earth and on your fellow humans.

No wonder your faith seems shaky; you’re looking for spiritual sustenance at the Country Club. Well; good luck with that.

Too funny, Roman A Cliff...

Not to freak anybody out here, but this is actually the feeling of a lot of women in LW's demographic, although it's not cool to talk about it. The fact that we have to supress it is maybe why LW is reacting intensely. Why is it a crime for a woman to want a husband, home and child? What is wrong with our society where you're not allowed to voice that desire for fear of scaring away a potential partner? Didn't our parents and grandparents have those same values, and isn't that why we're HERE? The second poster, NicoleShield said everything perfectly and succinctly: "And don't feel guilty for wanting something normal and healthy. It's like feeling guilty for getting your period."

This is a joke, right?

Stupid, stupid, stupid.