Letters to the Editor
Ben Sen
Published Letters: 541 Editor's Choice: 98
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A Growing Awareness
[Read the article: Open the closets on Capitol Hill]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I think L. Bayard is too quick to propose that being "out" wouldn't have effected Foley's pedophilia. In the treatment of behavior addictions, (which is what pedophila is) the first, second, and third goal, so to speak, is to have the addict accept themselves AS AN ADDICT.
Hence, the often repeated phrase, "I am an alcoholic," "I am a gambler," "I am a sex addict." It is the public admission and recognition of the "problem," that is the beginning, middle, and end of treatment.
By being known as "something," (it may not be an addiction either) an admission is made that it's true of us. We are identified with it and thus more likely to TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR IT. That is what people in the closet are ultimately denying: responsibility for their own lives. They have made themselves its victims.
And concomitantly, those who deny them that opportunity are declining to take responsibility for their own lives as well--SINCE HOMOSEXUALITY IS A NATURAL CONDITION for human beings. Basically, it is rejecting our personal right to control our own lives that is the most destructive premise of fundamentalism, regardless of the faith. They want their minister, priest, rabbi, immam or book to do it for them.
While there is no guarantee that someone as deeply disturbed as Mr. Foley will not act out whether his sexuality was public or not, at least there is a reason for him to have some control in the matter, or seek out an awareness of himself that would allow him to have control.
I have some optimism, despite the headlines, there is a slowly evolving awareness on behalf of educated Americans that it is harmful for everyone to force those who prefer their own sex to hide it. At present, the reactionaries are firmly in control, but with the evidence and growing acceptance in some segments of society--the retrograds may have to adapt.
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The Shame Game
[Read the article: Scapegoating gay Republicans]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Here's a question: what could possibly attract gays, particularly politicians, to the GOP in the first place? Why go there? Is it to "keep 'em guessing," or perhaps the sheer mendacity: you guys think there is something wrong with me, but look, you need me, I bring you votes, I bring you the plurality that allows you to win. Can't you see how wrong you are about being against gays?
And then there is the shame angle. The shame angle can't be avoided if the perpetration involves sex. What is it that allows a person who certainly knows better to threaten themselves in so obvious and self-destructive a manner? Foley is so perfect in this regard he would not be believable as a fictional character. The man who WRITES THE LEGISLATION to protect children against pedophiles engages in the behavior--on line--so there is a written record!
What is that if not a person who seeks shame--and in fact is so shame ridden--he can't even experience it in himself? This is what is pathetic about this sort of witch hunt. Six months from now, nobody will be the wiser. Foley will get a job working for one of his wealthy Palm Beach constituents, the GOP will continue to court the religious right, the ministers of the religious right will continue to manipulate their deluded flock, and the next generation of addicts will bide their time, waiting to sock it too those who would force them to deny their nature.
The shame game will continue as long as the repression and prejudice is sanctioned by the majority. This is evident when the broader issue itself is taken out of the closet. I can understand the anger of the gay rights advocates who want to out the hypocrites. I hope they will get heard, and not let their anger get in the way of their broader purpose.
Legislation would help, but not what has been drawn up. I'm talking about legislation THAT MADE IT A CRIME TO DESCRIMINATE AGAINST HOMOSEXUALS, and thereby made same-sex "unions," as much a right for gays as for Ma and Pa Kettle. I'm well aware that's a pipe dream in the current social order, but at least it puts the shoe on the right foot.
The reason why it's a pipe dream,however, is not really due to the retrograds, but with the current anarchy among liberals--and entails a shift in thinking that's a long way off.
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Call me Mr. Naive
[Read the article: The ignoble prize]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]It's encouraging to see so few responses that really berate Grass. If you take the inverse proposition, and try to make saints out of prizewinners who would there be to award prizes too?
Maybe it was my Catholic childhood, where I was taught to seperate the "sin from the sinner."
Maybe it is the fact that I wouldn't want to be judged on the basis of some of the stupid mistakes I made when I was young.
Maybe it is my self-doubt, that's it, the fear of my own self-rightousness that prevents me from requiring perfection in others. Of course I want to be judged personally as a "human being" full of caca.
I know, call me Mr. Naive, but give the prizes to the folks who do the best work, please.