And yes, I do like that Nova Scotian idea about keeping close to the family. Not very stylish, but damn good support and you can say almost anything and get away with it.

Speak for yourself, AJ. Some of us come from abusive, dominating families that - for whatever reason(s) - we must remain a part of. Doesn't mean we want to live within 1000 f@cking miles of them! My sanity and happiness increases proportionally with distance FROM the fam, not near to them.

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As for thrift, hedonism etc., I think Gautama Buddha said it best:

"A life of moderation - punctuated by moments of occasional excess - is the path to Happiness."

Amen! Saving and scrimping becomes easier when one can enjoy a periodic indulgence - a $4 pint of Godiva's ice cream, say.

A first-run movie (Slumdog, anyone) instead of waiting 10 weeks for it to come to the dollar cinema.

Or finally throwing away your holey, ancient current socks and splurging on a $5 high-quality couple of pairs a Kohl's.

Any others or personal examples, folks? =)

Good grief!! I never thought that I would be the one defending a mother's choices, Broadsheet-style....

But to Exquisite Koi and the others vilifying the author, essentially insinuating she's a slut who doesn't care if her baby gets diseased or raped because she dared to be intimate with a man at her home...

WTF?!?

Are single mothers supposed to take an 18-year vow of chastity?

And never again pursue romantic relations with anyone - lest it *gasp* cause some minor imbalance to their little brat's life?

No wonder so many of these women are resentful and bitter. Your neo-liberal Puritanism demands that they essentially walk around with a Scarlet Letter tattooed on their forehead.

To deny yourself adult needs for 18 years just so Junior and Dakota can grow up to be...what? Emotionally healthy? There's no guarantee there at all.

And your slagging of the author for actually giving in to her sexual needs once reflects how the Child-Centric Universe has royally fucked up our society.

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Finally, to Rachel Sarah:

Yeah, you made a bad choice with your baby's daddy.

But you DO have a right - in a responsible way - to satisfy your own desires.

Being a mother and being an adult woman are not mutually exclusive, contrary to what these 'Single Mom = Nun' prudes at Salon say.

Love your baby. Love yourself. Rock on.

Why do organic bananas sell at Whale Foods for $6 a bunch, when you can get them at Wal-Mart for much less (albeit a little bit more expensive still than regular bananas) ?

Why do people by a Prius for $22,000+ when a new Corolla offers the same space, practicality and lower yet still excellent mileage for $5000-$7000 less?

And in general: why are eco-friendly greenie products sold with ridiculous profit margins built into their high prices?

Because they are not targeted to people who are financially conservative, or who have little disposable income.

Eco-friendly products are marketed as ego-massagers and fashion statements to upper-middle class folk...

Buy an overpriced recycled fair trade tee-pee roll, pat yourself on the back. Better yet, tell your neighbors, friends and family so that they can pat your back too --

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smug_Alert!

You're absolutely right!

I didn't know about the use of corn cobs and other, umm, "implements" in those halycon pre-Charmin days until I visited a loo-focused exhibit at a local museum.

If ever you pass thru Sioux Falls, SD, visit the Old Courthouse Museum downtown. The permanent 'History of Toilets' exhibit is located on the 2nd & 3rd floors. It's an admittedly fascinating look into the history of outhouses, indoor plumbing, etc etc.

Am I joking? No, I shit you not!

{Sorry, couldn't help myself...=}

While I admit Ms. Ray invites a little good-humored scorn for her cheery annoyingness (or is it annoying cheeriness?), such as this classic Onion parody:

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/53604

I have to say I absolutely loved how she handled that reporter's guilt-trip questions about rugrats!

Kudos to you, Rachael - for refusing to be slimed by yet another self-righteous child-centric universalist. You live your life for yourself, your husband, your pooch and your customers and fans.

Contrary to what McFadden and others think, you are not a lesser human being for choosing NOT to become a slave to spoiled, undisciplined br...oh, I'm sorry, I mean: darling little angels.

Rock on, childless chica!