How many men have had kids with their wives at least partly because they (the men) wanted children?

And how many men have had kids with their wives because their wives ALONE wanted children?

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I am a young adult male who does not wish to have children.

No, I do not hate kids (as my adorable nephew & nieces can attest). No, I do not hate parents or parenthood. No, I am not innately selfish - time I would spend raising rugrats is time I now spend volunteering at an animal shelter, and helping out at a food bank.

The bottom line is: I do not wish to have kids - and I let any woman I'm dating know this clearly.

But...BUT...if I fell in love with someone for whom having children was a deal-breaker, then I would have kids with her to be with her.

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I simply wonder if I am the only man who would make such a choice.

And how many of those men are now being excoriated by wives who gave them the "kids-or-it's-over" ultimatum...and proceeded to scorn them for being less-than-perfect fathers.

(P.S. - I believe in equal task sharing, my bathroom is clean, and there's never a lingering pile of dirty dishes in my sink...for whatever that's worth)

So don't settle for either of these two blokes.

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That being said, I also ask you: please do not try to pressure a man who doesn't want kids into having children.

It's unfair to him, to you and to your eventual spawn.

There are enough guys who want to be dads out there...find & fall in love with one of them.

"If he's into you, it can only mean into having sex with you.

The rest, that he's not in it for love, should be assumed- men have no other level but sex. Hence the "I love you as a person but you're ugly so I'm going to go sleep with that hottie".

Forgive me for prying, but did you get involved with a guy who turned out to be a supreme asshole?

If you did, you have my empathy.

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You may choose to believe it or you may not, but there are men out there for whom it isn't just about the sex. I humbly submit myself as evidence.

Don't get me wrong - I think sex between two people with great chemistry AND who have strong romantic feelings toward one another is one of the greatest fucking experiences (no pun intended=) a person can have.

But it isn't just about fucking & sucking. I want more levels than mere sex.

I want silly jokes, shared guilty pleasures, all-niter intellectual conversations, sunsets and sunrises shared in voluminous silence...and to wake up to the sight of my disheveled love sleeping next to me.

And I'd reckon - hope? - that I am not the only guy out there who feels this way.

Cheers,

Lonely Wolf

Every artist is a cannibal, every poet is a thief...

-- from the U2 song 'The Fly'

Makes me a simpering touchy-feely wimp?

Yow-za...

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I see the "25 Random Things" phenomenon as a backlash to how we are conditioned to behave as adults.

At work and in polite company, we must maintain a sheen of normalcy and convention. "I bite my fingernails when I'm bored" or "My mom was raped in Sarajevo at age 15" doesn't quite cut it in these scenarios.

On a date and even within circles of 'good' friends, there are also aspects of our life and identity that may be awkward to share verbally. A Facebook post gives a relatively easy, ironically faceless means of spewing the guts about your existence.

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All that being said, I for one about not responding to being tagged for this "25 Random Things" list. Why?

1.) Call me old-fashioned, but there is something cool about having things about yourself known only to a select few people of value in your lives. A best friend, maybe...or the one you love.

Maybe I don't wanna share intimate details with some bloke I barely knew in 4th grade who I have not seen or actually spoken to in 20 years.

2.) My life isn't that interesting. Am I bad for concealing my boring uneventful existence from Facebook pals? =)

(...or, let's face it: "Tyra".)

Ms. Hilton will be hawking concentrated sulfuric acid as the perfect antidote to hot flashes - and many women across the USA will respect her expertise enough to buy her bullshit hook, line and sinker.

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What exactly is it about Oprah that makes (let's face it, middle-class white) women suspend their logic and ability to critically think?

I mean, we guys may admire any number of heroes...but if, say, Obama - who has no background in medicine - started announcing that prostate cancer could be cured by eating Miracle Whip (or *gasp* wrote a book about it), I'm guessing that very few of us would start piling up on mayo without hearing an ACTUAL doctor's opinion on the matter!

...To dogs.

Since childhood, I've enjoyed close bonds with several mutts... aGerman Shepherd mix, cocker spaniel mix, Husky-Rott (!) mix...

And each of our "friendships" have been infinitely more satisfying than most interactions I've had with people in my life...

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Dogs. Never selfish. Never conditional in love. Never bigoted nor judgemental. Never petty or malicious. Never an ulterior motive.

And even the naughtiest ones are easier to deal with than sniveling human kid brats.

Vive le pooch! =)