Must...resist...urge...to...make....juvenile...oral sex joke...(;-P

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A question for women (and, I suppose, perhaps some men too) on here:

When I was a little kid growing up/living in the British West Indies, I remember my Mom using something called "Witch Hazel" to clean her face.

Have any of you ever heard of that? I think it was alcohol-based, because I remember the smell of it.

I have NEVER seen it anywhere in Walgreens, etc., and I'm just curious to know if it is/was one of those old British colonial relics, or if it is/was widely used.

We've always won on the field of Logic.

So what did the GOP do? They fought dirty, appealing to the base emotions of the masses with Swift-Boat, Barack is a Muslim fundie and other bullshit lies and smears.

ONE person is smart and capable of parsing bullshit from Truth.

But the masses? As my old bumper sticker said, The Masses are Asses.

And so in 2004, trying to take the high road - we lost. Kudos to Kerry for being sage enough to admit that.

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And now?

Having won on Logic, we're taking it to these slimy conservative pricks on their own field.

We're fighting the Emotion War, especially these last couple days....

And if we have to drag McCain's affairs and horrendous flip-flopping (where oh where is that "maverick" from 2000?) into the fold, by God we will.

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Screw the perpetual polls - I smell neocon blood in the air...

I have had several conversations over the years - both with female and male friends - about the reasons for this.

Some friends (of both sexes) say that it comes down to paternal abandonment. (You know, that familiar refrain: "With men, it's all about Mommy. And women? Yup, it's all about Daddy."

In other words, father treats adolescent daughter with emotional neglect --> normalizes male interaction for daughter --> normalizes assholes as model of male behavior.

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Other friends, though (again of both sexes), have said that the reason instead has to do with the nature of beginning a relationship.

A girl who knows she is pretty does not want to hear she is pretty. (And similarly if she is smart, funny, etc.)

The earnest, decent, good-hearted lad who shows interest in a girl is a potential mate that the girl knows she can wrap around a finger. Where's the sport in that?

(And let's face it: the games of early romantic interaction are a sport. They are for so many other animal species - watch any Nature show to see how - so why not for us Homo sapiens?)

But the Asshole....ahhh, that irresistible Asshole.

Women know they won't get that compliment, that interest, that sense of security in the relationship from "him".

And they drive themselves batty to earn any of the above. That, I have to agree, is the allure.

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What is more appealing to you: a never-ending bowl of vanilla ice cream that is placed on your table before you...

Or the last couple spoonfuls of chocolate ice cream being offered to another diner?

Yup - the chocolate. We want that which might just be...but also NOT be...barely within our grasp.

This, I think, is at the heart of why assholes get laid.

Thoughts, anyone?

Cheers,

Lonewolfy

Half-Saint, Half-Bastard

Part of the reason it stuck in my memory is that I remember the bottle my Mom's Witch Hazel came in - it was tall, thin and ornate, kind of like an antique perfume bottle.

I also think it's pretty darn cool that some of you also remember your own Moms using it! Even though I grew up thousands of miles away from the USA, little common links like these are pleasant reminders of how much we really do all share...

I do believe the "Assholes get laid" theory is right, sadly...and my belief admittedly is based on anecdotal evidence (lots of it, FWIW)....

But I should have explicitly stated before that I certainly don't think that ALL women - or perhaps even MOST women - go for assholes over decent guys.

Many women for sure enter into romances with kind, caring, decent men...and many such romances certainly work out.

But the allure of the Asshole is real - not only as witnessed by me (a straight guy), but as I said also from close, platonic girl friends who have plainly admitted as much.

Heck, even one of my gay male friends has seen from his own experiences that this theory can apply to many in the GLBT community, too.

Human nature, maybe? Go figure.