You drip, DRIP, with your f-ness. Your every word drips. Logic is not even allowed in the door. Everything you say is justified based on emotions.

(Sitting here laughing my ass off.)

Oh Cary. I guess there's nothing about being an advice columnist that would lead to self-knowledge.

What I find most gruesome is the idea that little girls want pedicures. WTF? I mean really, WTF? Who are these kids and what kind of deranged parental units raised them?

I guess I can answer my own question with a little thought: these poor kids listen to their moms talk about how they'd really love some "pampering." They imitate what they see.

Bleah!

9 year olds don't need pampering. Their skin is perfect. They haven't had years of wearing shoes that give them ugly feet and they don't need pedicures. I have nothing against jewelry making (I still remember how to make a lanyard thingy from camp) but isn't the point of summer to do things outside?

Geez, what sort of guy doesn't like it when a woman moans in bed? She's supposed to moan, whimper, grunt, whatever. Guys pay good money to hear women FAKE that sort of thing.

The appropriate response to a lover's most intimate sounds is to be charmed by them, in all their weirdness. If the way she responds to lovemaking turns you off, you aren't sexually compatible. Learn to love it or find someone else. Hopefully she's not faking it, so the only way she'd be able to stop is to try to stay in control during arousal and orgasm, which kind of defeats the purpose of having sex.

Having an orgasm in front of someone implies a certain level of trust, which is incompatible with the other person criticizing the way you act when you come. Don't traumatize her; don't bring it up at all. Just go find someone else.

According to the "brain sex" test that was posted a while ago on Broadsheet, you measure on the inside, from the crease where your finger bends, with fingers slightly bent.

I find it interesting that my index fingers are considerably longer than my ring fingers, which would indicate that my verbal skills should be good and my math skills poor. However, I won the state math contest as a high school senior. I think most people who know me would say I'm more direct and competitive than otherwise. My husband, who is a professional 3d artist, which is about the most "male brained" activity I can imagine, also has longer index fingers. He's not exactly girly in his interests, either. So neither of us fit the profile which would be indicated by our finger length.

My mother, who is a writer with several books of genre fiction to her credit, a retired literature professor, and has an enormous vocabulary, has longer ring fingers. So she doesn't fit the profile either. My dad, who spent 25 years in the Special Forces, played football in college, and is an engineer and architect, has index and ring fingers of exactly the same length.

I have a feeling that actual scientists would tell me that there's nothing odd about any of this: the finger length represents a statistical tendency, and using it to make predictions about specific individuals makes no sense at all. However, Chemistry.com is doing just this.