Letters to the Editor
Allie_
Published Letters: 1409 Editor's Choice: 113
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what makes sense
[Read the article: Cuff 'em?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Well, it makes sense to me; I've seen it.
I recently counseled a young woman who let a cold develop into full-blown pneumonia rather than see a doctor because of laws requiring the doctor to report suspected spousal abuse. She wanted to wait until her bruises faded before seeking treatment, and so she waited herself right into a medical emergency.
Mandatory ANYTHING is a sucky idea. We are people, not programs; we have judgment for a reason and we should be be suspicious of anything which reduces the human ability to exercise discretion. Yes, a lot of people exercise it badly. Yes, it was frustrating when the police came to the same house for the umpteenth time and no one wanted to press charges and finally they came for the final time because he hit her a little too hard and she's dead now. Yes, it was appalling when the police wouldn't arrest anyone because it was a "domestic dispute." Forcing the police to make arrests hasn't improved anything; now we have women who won't call because although they really hate being given a black eye, it's not a big enough deal to them to leave him, and if he gets arrested, he'll lose his job and have to be bailed out and all the money will go to lawyers and the house will be foreclosed.
Why do women call the police when they don't want the man arrested? Pretty simple, really: so someone with authority will come and calm him down and make him stop hitting things, offer an unbiased perspective, and maybe shame him into not doing it anymore.
As another poster said, these are complex situations. One-size-fits-all laws don't benefit anyone.
AKA Smith, good to see you, and hope the vacation has benefited you; it did me. I'm sorry you've encountered bad cops. I've encountered some terrible ones but also some good ones. Not too many years ago, my next-door neighbor, drunk, threatened me as I was pulling into my driveway because one of our trees had grown so that it reached over his property and leaves were falling into his yard. He threatened to cut the tree down, and also threatened to beat the shit out of me. So instead of pulling in, I put the car in reverse and called the cops on him. The two fellows who showed up were obviously veterans. They knew him by name, knew that his mother had recently died and that he'd been drinking too much and picking fights since her death. They had a heart-to-heart conversation with him, at the end of which he was more or less sober, offered me a heartfelt apology, and mended his ways permanently. These guys were what cops should be; they settled a dispute in such a way that no one got arrested and peace was restored. They were polite and respectful to everyone, intelligent, and insightful. Sure, part of their motivation may have been that they didn't want to file an arrest report - but does that really matter when everyone ends up happy?
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as good as it gets
[Read the article: Bridges aren't supposed to fall down]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Several years ago a little bridge across the Nonconnah - near my house - collapsed during a flood; I seem to recall four people died, or maybe they were just hospitalized. Anyway I remember the many articles seeking answers after the fact.
Most people don't know that most bridges have something wrong with them. The money and manpower to keep all bridges perfect all the time don't exist. All bridges everywhere are in various states of being about to collapse. The government's job is to decide what to fix first.
Sometimes they screw up. This bridge wasn't expected to collapse. It wasn't high on anyone's priority list; if more money had been available, it still would have collapsed, because other bridges would have been fixed instead.
It does suck. But bridges do fall down, a little each day, and sometimes they fall faster than anyone expects. It's nice to have someone to blame in high places, but that's not where the blame belongs.