For providing a link to the story that works without having to sign up for a newspaper in a strange city.

I'm still wondering about the third rescuer. It seems to me that she's the missing link to understanding what's going on. D.A. strongly implies the witnesses differ in their accounts; we know what two of them say; the third witness has not spoken to anyone. Maybe she's good friends with one of the guys, or something similar.

AKA Smith, your story demonstrates how strong the cultural requirement for politeness is. In our society, we aren't taught how to deal with people who are bald-faced about evil. There's no approved reaction. So you go on eating dinner with a rapist, because what's the alternative? Making a fuss? I've been following your letters for a while and it's obvious you've a person of strong character who thinks about morality a lot, yet apparently you didn't feel able to express your outrage to a man who admitted rape right in front of you. Here's what I wish you would have done: Not gone to the restaurant. Said that you had been mistaken about who and what the man was, and now that you knew, you would no longer associate with him. Offered your friend help to leave him.

The funny thing is, in earlier times (which were reportedly even more polite), it wasn't unusual for people to do just that: "cut" someone for being a known rogue. Scumbuckets who got caught could be forced out of good society.

I hope you won't take my comments as a personal attack on you; I was simply shocked by your story, and by what it has to say about all of us.

Cary's right about asking him what those words mean to him. I'm guessing they would mean, "You're not just another girl I happen to be dating and will probably break up with in a few months, but the love of my life." And he's not ready to say that.

You're an actress, right? Ever dated anybody before him? Did you tell that guy you loved him? That you'd stay with him forever? Did you mean it at the time, or did you know on some level that it was bullshit, part of the game?

He's not playing that game. That's both a good thing and a bad thing, depending on how you look at it.

One thing Cary didn't say: Don't cry and demand someone say "I love you." That's pathetic and manipulative and emotionally blackmailing and he must love you on some level or he would have broken up with you for being such an ass. Crying to get what you want, great idea. Not.