It doesn't take a vague, wandering article to figure out what he thought of his victims or why they trusted him.

He knew they had money. He wanted their money. They "knew" he could make money-and he seemed like a nice guy.

He knew that he could keep it up forever if he acted like a nice guy to everyone. Somewhere towards the end of it, he couldn't find any more victims and knew that he had to give up his game.

It's simply called amoral greed and he was full of it. He played the damned system like a pro, and is still playing it-he gets to sit in his penthouse jail laughing at everyone while they figure out where he spent all the money. It's long gone and he enjoyed playing with it.

He had a good time doing it, and he doesn't give a rats' ass about anyone else.

Sociopath is as close to a real name for this scum.

Tell your boss that if you do not have an assistant very soon, you will have a raging breakdown and they will have to pay for your hospitalization at the best rehab that's available.

Print out your letter to Cary, and have your boss read it.

Then ask him "What is my job, and why are you killing me?"

Also ask him why you're the only one who can answer stupid questions from people who have nothing better to do than to email you with why they're not getting anything done, when they're emailing you angry emails demanding updates and more work that they should be doing themselves.

Then tell your co-workers to get back to work and stop harassing you with their problems.

Don't quit, though. Ask for a transfer, if possible. That will work. Once transferred, your co-workers will possibly even appreciate your talents more than they realize right now. The poor schmuck who takes over your position will have the craziness you're experiencing.

It's a job, not a lifestyle. Treat it like one.

For years I've always wondered if autism (forgive me my cynicism) was a "real" disease.

Your essay turned my question into nothingness. You have my sympathy in your struggle to understand your son's plight and your own.

Whether or not the scientists and doctors will ever truly be able to understand why this happens and how is ever more important now because so many children are being diagnosed with autism, and does this anecdotal evidence preclude a normal life for any of them?

In fact, where did this come from, and why did it mutate into such terrible destruction of the human soul?

I believe it is not a natural phenomenon, and am beginning to wonder if it isn't human inflicted. We've poisoned ourselves to the point where man-made diseases become more prevalent from birth because we've destroyed so much of our own habitat.

But please throw away the pills. Your death would not serve a purpose. Your essay has opened more than a few eyes.

It did mine. Thank you.

At first, I was on the side of the "get over it" crowd.

Then I reflected very carefully on my life, and found that I was once in that place where the letter writer is-not exactly, but as close as one can be to being so obsessed with another person who dumped me.

I can say the pain is awful, exquisite and exhausting.

My advice is to get a therapist, and move out of the area where he is, literally-change your job and change your entire life away from where he is, or where you might even encounter someone who you and he both knew or know. Cut off all ties to this man and your past affair.

This is not a normal "get over it" story-it is more of an destroying, obsessive clinging to a past that won't ever be corrected or changed. By constantly probing the wound, you're letting it fester and infect your entire being-and it's destroying any self-worth you have. Not good.

Then you can live your life as you were meant to.

You can only survive it-not get over it.

After all, he's moved on with his life. Why can't you?

To be brutally honest, he's probably gotten all traces of you out of his life-and he doesn't give you more than a fond 'she was a nice person for that time in my life' once in a very rare while.

Return the favor. He's not the person now you were with then. He's changed and so should you.

It's your life-not his. Stop giving him the power to rule it.