Letters to the Editor
AKA Smith
Published Letters: 5619 Editor's Choice: 86
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Dear Deeply Conflicted, you’re Not Her Daddy.
[Read the article: My 28-year-old girlfriend wants to do drugs -- just like I used to!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]So don’t behave like one. You’re 42 years old and have your own settled habits. You drink a bit of wine. You smoke a little pot. Nowhere in your letter did I read that you want to give up these things so that you can be a positive influence upon her. I am glad of that, because for a minute there I thought you were taking up foster care.
She is an adult. Twenty-eight, while young to your 42, does not mean she is either naïve or innocent. You should not pretend that she is. She should not pretend that she is. That would not be a good game for either of you. If she has unresolved Daddy-issues, allow her to resolve them without your help. Keep smoking your weed and drinking your wine.
However, if she lives with you, then both of you have a right to develop household boundaries. I would not live with someone who was doing serious drugs. I would not have such drugs in my house. I would not live with someone on the downhill road. If it is your home or you are paying at least half the rent, make that clear.
What you most want to avoid is supplying her with drugs. Good Daddies don’t do that for their little girls and she will never forgive you if you do. You also want to avoid acting like her warden. She won’t forgive that either. If you take a parental roll towards her, you will, whether you want to or not, become suddenly responsible for her decisions. One way or another, you will pay and pay and pay.
Once you have established the “No serious drugs in this house” rule, you can judge how the relationship is going by how much time she spends gone. Above all, treat her like an adult. When adults make bad decisions, life takes a bite out of them. You won’t have to punish her. Her own choices will do it for you; therefore, don’t fix any resulting problems for her.
About her work: Maybe you aren’t so cool with that either.
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This is so cute.
[Read the article: Inside the Creation Museum]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]God created Eve with long hair and Adam has already been to the barber. Barbers in Eden! Who knew?
I wonder why they have all those stupid water lilies?
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Black President? Texas vote?
[Read the article: Barack Obama's quiet rebellion]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]No way. I live in Texas. Lots of electoral votes here. From what I know of the people here, Texas will never be in the electoral column for a black President. And a black First Lady? Not going to happen.
Not too far from where I live, it was found that a school bus driver was making all the black and Hispanic children sit in the back of the bus.
Sadly, racism lives.
Oh, and they aren't going to vote for a woman for President either, not even if she were Republican Kay Bailey Hutchinson -- unless, of course, she was running against Hillary. They surely do hate Hillary in the small town where I live.
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This ruling is so unreasonable that
[Read the article: Suing paycheck to paycheck]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]among the corrections the legislative branch should apply to this problem is to require all employers to publicly post the salary or hourly wage of every single employee.
The rationale for this is so that employees will immediately know if they are being discriminated against.
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"First of all, quite likely she's already using and trying to get you used to the idea."
[Read the article: My 28-year-old girlfriend wants to do drugs -- just like I used to!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]The above quote from Anonymous is proably the brutal truth.
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Sandra M,
[Read the article: My 28-year-old girlfriend wants to do drugs -- just like I used to!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I think you mean rite of passage and not "right of passage."
We have come to a pretty pass when hard drugs become a "right."
But don't get upset. In my above post, I couldn't spell probably.
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Not About Age Difference but About Tone
[Read the article: My 28-year-old girlfriend wants to do drugs -- just like I used to!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I don't think it was the age difference that was the issue for most people, but rather it was the age difference combined with the tone. The tone was one of an assumption that the girlfriend could be controlled or powerfully influenced by the LW's decisions in this matter.
Most people have limited ability to really control these choices that a partner makes. If two people are consistently making very different choices, then it makes sense to wonder if these two people are truly compatible.
My father was almost 14 years older than my mother. There was no question who was in charge. She was! She was also rabidly anti-alcohol. However, that didn't keep him from tying one on occasionally.
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Ghingis Can, you can attest all you want,
[Read the article: Suing paycheck to paycheck]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]but you are not ultimately the person who makes the final decision. Furthermore, as an employer, you may not exactly have the employees' best interests at heart in the first place. Maybe your eye is on the bottom line.
Tell you what you can do to make certain everything is fair: Publish for your employees the wages and salaries of each of them so that they can compare.
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Creepy.
[Read the article: Maybe he really is "the commander guy"]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]None of the three versions of the story is reassuring. I wish his doctor would get him a psych eval for this megalomania he seems to have.
What are our options if the President is CRAZY?