Letters to the Editor
AKA Smith
Published Letters: 4551 Editor's Choice: 83
-
Rape by Fraud
[Read the article: Does sex through fraud constitute rape?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Those who are interesting in reading more about the issue of rape by fraud might obtain more information by going to the following address:
http://www.spr.org/pdf/Rape%20by%20Fraud.pdf
It was there that I learned that such laws have allowed the prosecution of doctors who used sexual intercourse on their patients under the guise of vaginal examination. Rape by fraud laws protect women from sexual exploitation and certain forms of sexual coercion. I even noticed that a man who had sex with a prostitute and then not paid her was prosecuted. There is also mention of several cases where sex has been obtained by means of false identity and are very similar to the one mentioned in the Broadsheet article. Apparently such tactics on the part of rapists are not rare.
If sexual fraud laws are not contained within the rape statutes of a state, then at the very least certain forms of sexual fraud should be codified so that situation of this sort allows the victim some recourse.
For those who want to say that the victim in the present case had to be dumb in order to not know that Alvin was not Duane, I have to say that I strongly disagree. But even if the victim is stupid that does not mean that Alvin did not commit fraud. If the facts of the case are as presented by the victim, then I believe that Alvin is guilty of both rape and fraud.
As someone who has worked with people with mental retardation, I ask you, do you want them to be at the mercy of other people who would trick them into sex? The moral question here is, "Is it okay to fool people into having sex simply because they are sleepy, drunk, confused, stupid, or ignorant of the identity of the person they are having sex with?"
Isn't interesting that so many people want to argue that this woman is:
1. A liar.
2. If she isn't a liar, she is stupid.
Also, isn't it also interesting that anyone who would say that this woman may have actually been raped by fraud is automatically deemed a man hater?
What is at issue here is what has always been a crucial issue for women: Do we or do we not have the right to control our own bodies?
-
When I note that you have attached your questions to a relevant article,
[Read the article: Does sex through fraud constitute rape?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I will then answer your questions.
As I see it, topics relevant in the discussion of this article are rape and fraud directly connected with the issue of rape.
-
Hi anonymous LW. Thanks for sharing some more with us.
[Read the article: My husband has Chinese ancestry but his son wants to keep it secret]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]You are a good sport.
Of course when we respond we have to rely upon the necessarily limited information we are intially given. I found the additional information you gave fascinating.
-
To laurel962:
[Read the article: My husband has Chinese ancestry but his son wants to keep it secret]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]The question is not whether she has the right to know but whether the LW would be the right person to tell her. The LW now says that she and her husband visit with the family only a few times a year. This implies that she is not close to the daughter.
However, if the daughter ever began to hint to the LW about doubts about her origins or outright inquired if she was adopted, I would suggest the LW tell her the truth. One person's lie does not obligate another to support that lie.
I think all families have secrets. Exposing those secrets usually upsets somebody. Secrets do not equal lies. I am sometimes willing to keep people's secrets. I am almost never willing to lie for them and would greatly resent being told that I must.
Mr. & Mrs Shep have bad judgment to say the least.
-
Good Insight from those Who Stuck to the Subject!
[Read the article: Does acting like "one of the boys" make you more likely to be harassed?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I always learn something from people who are able to describe their personal experiences. Sure studies are interesting, but I have a great appreciation for those here who described actual harassment problems.
Kc10867 was really useful in his description of bullies. I think there is a sociopathic element in most bullies. I think we tend to underestimate just how many sociopaths there are and the damage that they can do to anyone else in the workplace.
MWise, I have to concur with you that those wooing types that won't quit are the most difficult with whom to deal. Especially creepy are those who say you look tired and then creep up behind you with an oh-so-generous back rub. At first you think they want to be your buddy. The next thing you know they are calling your house a 11pm saying that they care about you and really, really want to help you in any way they can. I hate a guy who won't be honest. I'd rather deal with one who says what he wants up front.
As to the dangerous ones, I would simply carry a concealed weapon -- pepper spray, mace, or a gun. Women aren't nearly assertive enough or proactive enough about their own personal boundaries.
As to the study: What on earth does it mean? What is feminine behavior? Prissing. Filing one's nails. Remembering to say "Thank you sooo very much?" What is masculine behavior? Thinking? Logic? Offering an opinion? Pursuing one's goals? All this seems like appropriate workplace behavior to me. It seems the study just offers yet another Catch-22 to confuse women.
I offer as an example the personality of a woman I know: She is 25. She is head-turningly beautiful. She is mannerly somewhat by rote, but very very goal-directed. Other traits are high IQ, logical, unemotional, competitive, and direct.
So where would she fit in such a study?
BTW, she has Aspergers. Half the time when men are trying to get her attention she doesn't even notice it. I actually watched a guy whose behavior verged on sexual harrassment of her. She actually smiled vaguely at him and said "Thank you" and then returned to talking about the subject at hand.
Later, when I tried in a motherly way to bring up the incident, she didn't even remember it. It simply did not compute, compute, compute. Her field: IT.