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"I then figured out I had no idea what to do if we had started rolling without the flaps deployed! Advice, Patrick?
That is a good question!
I once alerted the flight attendants to an aircraft flying _very_ close to the one we were in (you could see the people in the windows!) that was below and to our left. Distance is notoriously hard to judge in the air, but I'd say it was less than 300 feet away.
After looking out my window, the attendant _ran_ up the short aisle and went into the cockpit, after which we banked rather sharply right, and gained altitude. I'd love to have known if "we" were in the "right" or "wrong", or if it was the other plane screwing up, but I shared no common language with the crew.
On the way out of the aircraft after landing, the same attendant pointed me out to the captain (who was standing in the cockpit doorway waiting) and he shook my hand very warmly. So that was nice.
The lesson I've always taken from that is: if you see something strange, no matter how much of an idiot you might feel, say something to the flight attendants!
And if you're a nervous passenger, and this has made you more nervous, then I'm sorry. It was a while ago, in a relatively small and unsophisticated aircraft, and in a jurisdiction which was, I've been told by people who should know, pretty air traffic control free!