The above question, which the odious Lynn Cheney posed to Wolf Blitzer yesterday and the odious O'Riley posed to Letterman last night, is the latest GOP focus group-tested and think-tank-approved When Did You Stop Beating Your Wife?-type slogan.

Here's how I would answer it:

Gee, Mr. or Ms. Vader, how do you define "victory"? I ask because four years ago, people like you defined victory as cheering throngs of liberated Iraqis leading U.S. invaders to Osama bin-Laden and Saddam's weapons of mass destruction. The fighting was to have lasted last six days, maybe six weeks, but not six months; the occupation would last 4-6 months; and Iraqi oil revenues would pay for reconstruction as a pro-Western democracy took hold. Since none of that has happened -- not one thing -- despite 23,000 casualties, and now, five years after 9/11, Osama bin-Forgotten, please be so kind as to tell me how the Republicans are defining "victory", so that I can tell you if I think it is worth the cost.

Excuse me for posting so many comments in this single thread; this will be my last one. But the interview with Ms. Paglia brought a lot of right-wing visitors into Salon; and I've enjoyed the "interaction" with them (such as it has been, despite their inarticulateness).

I don't care that the Democrats don't have a solution for Iraq. I'm not sure a solution really exists, other than not lying to start wars in the future. I don't care that the Democrats are craven political opportunists, though it would be nice if they acted on principle, in unison, once in a while. Above all, I don't care that Bill Clinton HAD SEX!! WITH A WOMAN!!!!!

What I care deeply about is that Cheney and Junior lied to start a war. They made false statements of fact, repeatedly, regarding non-existent WMD and connections to 9/11. Because of their lies, perhaps half a million mostly innocent people (thus far) have died horrible deaths. They've never apologized, and they've not been held accountable.

Oh yeah, and they repealed the U.S. Constitution along the way. Not to mention the sick, disgraceful fact that five years after 9/11, Osama (who bin-Forgotten) is still a free man.

Blame all the Democrats who failed to call bullshit and stand up to their lies. Blame Hillary and John Kerry and the others who voted for their war, if you must. But Bush and Cheney (and Rumsfeld, Rice, Powell, Tenet, Wolfowitz, Perle, Feith, Hadley, and the rest of them) must be held accountable. How the right-wingers get past all this, is beyond me.

Bush and Cheney must be impeached, for the sake of the American Republic.

Tet '68 was a U.S. victory? Uhh, OK. But in the immortal words of Pyrrhus, "One more such 'victory', and we shall be completely undone." (Which is exactly what happened.)

The GOOD news is that such an amazing inability to see the forest for all the damn trees means there must be a place for our dear Sgt. Rock in the Bush-Cheney regime -- maybe in Rumsfeld's office. After all, the U.S. won the war in Vietnam (and Laos, and Cambodia) every day for 10 years, until it was finally lost. It looks like the neo-cons are determined to achieve a similar "victory" in Iraq -- despite the heroic efforts of the antiwar GI's.

Incidentally, is it just me? or does all this "You have insulted the Army!" "No, I would never insult the honor of the Army!" nonsense sound eerily reminiscent of Germany (and France) -- not in the Nazi era, but rather in the Kaiser Wilhelm II era? Yeah, we all know how THAT age of fetishistic militarism ended. (Don't we?) [Paging Captain Dreyfuss . . . ]

When gambling away the millions you earned hectoring your fellow citizens on their moral values, in blackjack always hit on 16.

When buying illegal drugs with the money you earned castigating hippies and other moral degenerates, send your maid instead.

When whipping up hysteria about non-existent WMD, make sure your own kids don't get drunk and accidentally join the military.

When paying for homosexual sex while campaigning against gay rights, remember that Viagra is way cheaper in the Caribbean.

No matter how much trouble you might get into, always remember the Costanza defense: it's not a lie, as long as YOU believe it.

Good thing the Southern plantation owners didn't have modern GOP spin doctors:

Slavery is treated as normal in The Bible. Therefore, this "Abolitionist" movement is based on disrespect and hatred of (my) religion; and we conservatives are sick and tired of being mistreated in the drive-by Yankee press. At the very least, prior to recklessly changing the definition of "property" -- a definition that has stood since the dawn of civilization -- why not let our state legislators (whom we also own) vote whether to keep or end human slavery?

Two quick hits:

1) I've heard the Angie Paccione commercial. (Yes, I realize everyone can probably see it on the internets.) She delivers the line (in response to the notion that gay marriage is THE issue of our time), "Are you kidding me?" with exactly the right degree of attitude. It's cool.

2) I was only able to hear snatches of his show today, but it sounded to me like the Voice of London (see: V for Vendetta) was talking mostly about his hearing disability and weight issues and how global warming is a fraud -- and has given up entirely on trying to spin the various GOP scandals, which are coming too fast and furious. That has to be a good sign.