Letters to the Editor
Katymurta
Published Letters: 116 Editor's Choice: 10
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Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
[Read the article: My boyfriend dumped me and I'm desolate]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Dear LW:
I know all too well what you are going through. I went through a very painful breakup about 10 years ago. I never thought I'd see the light, feel good again--I was in that much pain.
But time does heal all wounds and this man has come back to me, several times, to express his regret for cutting off the best thing he had. Maybe your guy will too....and by then, you will have moved on, like I did.
Because we do move on. There really isn't any choice. And, although I agree with Cary most of the time, I think he got a bit flowerly with this one. Simply said, we allow ourselves to grieve and, eventually, grief will be replaced with anger and then, eventually, anger will be replaced with acceptance. And then, after acceptance, relief.
You mentioned you wanted steps to help recover....I'd recommend writing your feelings in a journal that no one else need see. Get your feelings out there. That will help. Stay busy with activities that you enjoy. Maybe consider a grief counseling group. This breakup might help you discover who you really are and what you want in life.
If you are suicidal, address that first. Just remember that, if you hang in there, these intense feelings of loss will be lessened. Just gotta have faith....and take action.
Trust me on this one.
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And why are we debating this?
[Read the article: The joys of life without God]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I don't get it. I really don't. I see no conflict whatsoever to believe in a Higher Power and believe in science/evolution.
I don't know what 'God' is and I have long since resigned from the debating society on that one. I just know that there is some sort of a Higher Power very much interested in our world, us, me. I know this simply because I have had profound (and I mean PROFOUND) spiritual experiences in times of duress and fear. And, no, I don't need meds.
The thing is, I believed long before I had those experiences. I never needed any prodding in accepting the fact that there is a loving presence presiding over all of us.
Am I Christian? Not really. Do I believe in the Bible? Parts of it I interpret symbolically and the rest I write up as political stances at the time. Do I believe in evolution? Yup--makes sense to me and there is overwhelming evidence to support it. Doesn't it make sense that our Higher Power set forth the motion of life in the form of evolution? And perhaps created the physical laws of nature? Why is that such a stretch?
So much of this debate is a collision of different experiences--separate but each perfectly valid.
Our thoughts, desires, and beliefs create our reality. And the reality of an atheist will be different from the reality of a 'believer' (whatever that means--Christians don't hold a monopoly on faith). For thousands of years, everyone's reality overlapped, to a certain extent, to create a mutually-agreed upon concept of the world. I predict this will change. Nay, it already is--as our ability to create our reality picks up speed in this point of our evolution, then the differences between separate realities become more pronounced. We will be living, so to speak, in separate worlds.
If this makes absolutely no sense, may I suggest any reader to pick up "Seth Speaks" and ponder that.
The scientist and the theologian will someday discover that they are searching for the same entity but choose to call it different names.
In the meantime, I intend to keep praying to my Higher Power and continue to be guided by its loving hands, as I have been for the past 45 years.
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Beautifully written...
[Read the article: Hillary is us]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]...Rebecca. Why don't YOU run for president?
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One Bank
[Read the article: Odds-on office talent show winner]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]This is awesome and funny as hell. What I can't figure out is why the BofA employees weren't laughing...those bank people don't have much humor, do they?
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Don't give up on CA just yet...
[Read the article: I left New York for San Diego and now I don't know where I am]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I especially felt drawn to this letter because, like Cary, I moved out to CA when I was 21. That was in 1982. And, like the LW, I moved from the east coast. I was fortunate enough to land in San Francisco--a city full of Easterners who got tired of commuting in the snow and the gloomy, pessimistic attitude of the east coast.
So, San Francisco was a wonderful, happy medium for this New Englander. It has the sensibility of the east and the gentler, kinder weather (and attitudes) of the west. People are smart...and they aren't so thin-skinned as they are in So. CA. At least they weren't when I lived up there in the 90s.
It worked well for me for almost a decade.
Then I moved to LA. A whole different world, a whole different Califonia. I moved down here for good reason--to finish my undergrad degree at a very good school. I have no regrets.
I stayed because I got work here and I got sober here. That changed everything.
However, I really relate to the LW's frustration of the lack of directness out here and people's inability to be upfront and honest, especially in relationships/friendships. I go though cycles of not talking to some of my closest friends because too many of them seem incapable of telling me what's going on.
So, I think about moving back up to the City, where I will find many of my old friends and new ones from the east coast. Sometimes, in an especially weak moment, I think about moving back to Boston. Then I think about the snow.
My only recommendation to you, LW, is to explore more of CA before you jet back to NYC. I think you had good reason to leave--I have family members back there who have hardened as a result of living in the intensity of New York.
Besides, like I said, San Francisco is very, very different than So. CA. Try it. You might like it.
Good luck and God bless.