Letters to the Editor
melew1
Published Letters: 93 Editor's Choice: 5
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Bad situation all around
[Read the article: I can't stop stealing!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]First off, the LW's boss is an absolute naive fool for giving safe keys to a newly hired employee on the first day of work. I once had a boss who, like his, trusted everybody. A really nice guy. Handed out business keys left & right, to new employees & old...pretty much everybody. Naturally, over the course of several years, he allowed himself to be taken advantage of, embezzelled from, the victim of various material thefts, pretty much got himself robbed blind. Always complained about his cash flow problems. I had to believe that if he'd had better insight & awareness into what was happening as a more competent, vigilant boss/owner, the business would not have suffered the way it did, & would have been very successful & profitable. Although it was a frustrating circumstance to watch as it unfolded, he eventually wised up & used more discretion in his hiring practices & business rules. His business did eventually thrive & succeed.
There are also certain types of people who, once they get a taste of that easy forbidden fruit, get swept away in a heady rush with that embolding sort of high, like an addictive drug, they may be unable to stop their pilfering. They may feel guilty about it afterwards at first, but once they find out how easy it is to steal, they don't want to stop because it gives them a sense of empowerment. A visceral thrill that leads them to want to steal more, especially if a person like the LW grows up in a dysfunctional environment where he feels powerless over his surroundings. In a sense, he has acquired the earmarks of an addict with the initial high of getting away with committing a risky act followed by feelings of remorse & guilt which gnaw at his conscience. Now that he's recognized that he has a problem with theft, he needs to own up to it, quit, somehow offer restitution, & possibly address the need for therapy. He may have needed the money, but I think there are more subtle, subliminal psychological factors at work here.
You couple a naive, trusting business owner with an emotionally dysfunctional employee, you have a recipe for potential disaster. I wish for both the LW & his boss the best of luck in their future.
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Do some reading
[Read the article: I'm doing stand-up and it's working. Should I quit my job?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]In addition to the good advice posted here, you could also do some research into the lives of comedians who became successful. What were their lives like before they made a decision to commit to doing their standup? What types of jobs did they have before, & how did they fit it all in to make it work? It may help you to gain some insight. At some point in their lives, I'm sure the majority of them were all in the exact same boat you're in right now, & it it may be helpful to read up about what they experienced personally before reaching the top. After reading about a few comedians myself, it seems they all had one thing in common--they followed their hearts to ensure their dreams became reality albeit through much sacrifice & hard work.
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metaphors
[Read the article: What I wouldn't do for my cat]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Every day I think about the health of my 3 aging kitties, & wonder how long it will be before I'm finally forced to say goodbye. Yes, I've spent a fair amount on them over the years due to a variety of illnesses & swallowed items, & I'll continue to do so as need be. But...
The biggest emotional hurdle will be the day that I'm forced to put down my oldest cat. She's now 18, & belonged to my mother who passed away 5 years ago. Since this cat is the last tangeble connection I have with my mom, she's become a symbolic metaphor for the close connection I shared with her while she was alive. My mom's personality is reflected in the sweetness of her gentle nature having raised her, & it gives me comfort 5 years later. But just as I watched my frail mom battle her heart disease, I now watch her frail kitty battle her kidney disease...& it will be hard to let her go.
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just my take
[Read the article: Old women got the blues]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I think the friendly nature of XJS AND ME simply stems from a generational characteristic which is, I believe, more common in older people. I see it frequently, many of the older men & women I've met are simply more openly cordial than the younger ones. My mother never thought twice about striking up conversations with total strangers, & she made many friends--many of them decades younger. They come from a less hurried & more trusting, one-on-one engaging place, & he probably mistakenly equivocated the unfriendly demeanor he experienced with the younger women with rudeness, although in certain instances maybe not. It's just how he precieved it given his age. Hence the label.
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growing old
[Read the article: Old women got the blues]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]I can understand why many elderly women get depressed given all the physiological ravages that ensue over time along with the tragedy of losing a beloved spouse. However, there's sometimes a flipside: There's that rare bird of an elderly woman who suddenly feels unencumbered by the societal pressures & angst she experienced as a younger woman, & who then develops the liberating perspective of "who gives a flying rat's ass anymore." That was my mom's attitude when she reached her 70's, & she always maintained that since she knew the end of her life was coming soon anyway, she may as well embrace it for all it was worth. She delighted in acting ridiculously goofy (sometimes in public) despite my occasional embarrassment, & knew that at her age she could get away with just about everything & anything. This coming from a woman who lost both her sister (Christmas Eve) & mother the same week at the age of 15, 3 major heart surgeries, a painful divorce, a bout with depression & addiction, & a nearly fatal nosebleed.
Up until the day she died, she maintained a wonderful zest for all that life had to offer, & I can only hope that when I reach her age, I'll be able to follow her example (however it's rather doubtful).