Did she sign up for using the best years of your life on taking care of your mom (understandable) and your married sister? (not damn likely).

This advice sounds like a recipe for divorce. Cleave to your wife, care for your child. Or lose them.

Lets see - mom of a small child, and fulltime medical residence - and you want to add the stress of taking care of your mom and sister -- when? What free hour of the day? Her next few years are going to around the clock busy, and she is going to need your time and attention. Because you are going to have so much spare time with a new job? And spending quality time with your son. Where are you going to find time for taking care of someone who is currently living on her own just fine? Yes she may get sick and need to live with you, but don't invite that stain until you have to. (Not to mention you are making an assumption that she would want to - start ignoring mom's guilt trips) The more time you spend on your marriage and child now, the stronger your marriage will be, so that when you do need to move mom in, the strain will do less damage. Now is not the time.

Oh, yeah and two young people with a young child, fresh from college in their first jobs, are going to have the money to buy a house in Denver big enough to have a separate living area for mom. What planet do you live on Cary?? Have you seen house prices in Denver? -- sorry but a new college teacher, a resident, and no job history , fresh from school will be living in an apartment for awhile. A nice apartment, but an apartment , until they can save up a downpayment, pay off school, and the cost of moving to Denver, plus child care -- oh and her medical bills from the pregency, since student insurance is a little unimpressive. Get real.

That is the real issue, and your not being gay is in the way of her fantasy -- it has nothing to do with how you dress. If you shaved and looked girlie - she'd still want to do it. The real issue is your boss has no self control, and is sexually harassing you, and you are letting her - because you are afraid your gay friends will be offended if you fight back.

Just tell her, "even if she was the last guy on earth, you'd never ....."

Then start making comments about how straight she looks.

Don't be a wuss, fight for your rights, and do it with witnesses, lots of them, she has power because she is doing these things behind your back, take out a flashlight, and challenger her in public...she will back down, because she is out of line. And everyone will know it when you make a fuss, and call her on it.

If you stay silent they will all think it is true, after all if it wasn't true -- YOU"D say something wouldn't you???

Cary, you totally blew it. Not shaving is not a sign of being gay, after you don't shave do you? Gay? Perhaps she lives in the North were there is no sun- hence everyone wears pants/tights & sweaters, and if you wear jeans all the time why shave?? We are pale, and show no skin, shaving is for the stupid - and the new comers from sunnier lands.

The current line men are mostly from the Baby Boom generation - that LARGEST demographic group in the country. It is not true that later generations are lazy, unmotivated spoiled brats. There are just fewer of them. A LOT fewer of them. So if the largest demographic in our history is retiring were do you get replacements? From one of the smallest demographic groups - healthy folks from 20-30? Look at the census and see how small a group that is - its the group where the Boombers forgot to have kids, or delayed -- causing an adnomally small group.

Not to mention what else do you notice about the 20-30 year old group -- you know that lazy bunch of so and so? Oh, yeah 100,000+ have been fighting a war -- perhaps being in Iraq makes it hard to take a lines man job, and when they come back, it doesn't sound like a lot of them will be in shape to deal with the real world.

Then the stupid drug on war -- pretty much giving a criminal record to the minority population in this age range over something that should be legal -- but bars them from college financial aid - ever, bars them from most jobs - forever....

You can't find the workers, not because they are lazy, but because they don't exist. There are not enough people in the 20-30 range in existence, and some of them are in Iraq, some in college, and some in other careers all competing with this and every other industry looking at soon to be mass retirements of the boomers.

And the 100,000 -- I work for a power company -- bull.

And you will work at 3am in an icestorm for as many hours as it takes, some people will get killed -- and the benefits (health, dental... go down every year) there is no career path and it doesn't pay that much until you've been doing it for decades.

Seniority in the union matters, at first you may not even be full-time, but a hiring hall body -- ie you are not an employee but you wait in the hall until you have seniority to take an opening, meanwhile doing part time, or filling in for people who are sick.