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Published Letters: 4
I'd like to see a companion piece to this from a woman who has gone fifteen years in a marriage (straight or gay) without sex. And come to think of it, one from a man who has gone fifteen years. I'm probably just trying to justify my own long-standing bias against marriage, but reading this article did give me a sense of "the grass is always greener..." I also wonder, as a woman with a lower sex drive, is it possible to be in a happy monogamous long-term relationship with a man or woman with not much sex?
Not that you need more advice, but I hear where you're coming from. I've been in much the same situation as you (almost failed in college due to depression and an eating disorder), and I think a lot of what it had to do with was anxiety, which often goes with eating disorders. Dealing with the anxiety (whether that means medication, or cutting out coffee, alcohol, sugar) might help.
You obviously are very bright, as you have been able to get back into a good school, but you may be living in the past a bit. Going to school now may be a different experience than before. Your antidepressant is working but you are procrastinating (as a previous writer said, most people do). I agree with that writer: law school can be among your priorities, but it doesn't have to be at the top of the list. Doing small things every day toward the bar exam may get you rolling toward spending more time on studying. I wish you luck. I'm in my second year of an MSW (social work) program, and I'm loving it.
You said what I've always felt. Summer is vastly overrated, especially for an introvert like me. For me, the trick is not going to things that I don't enjoy (but consequently, spending way more time by myself than I would like).
I think the LW was jumping the gun when he bought the houseboat. It's almost as though he has a "bucket list" of things that he must do in order to be fulfilled before he dies. Single dad of adopted boys? Check. Dream of living on houseboat? Check. What doesn't come through in his letter is an acknowledgement that he has made an enormous commitment to the sons that he has adopted. Followthrough is what comes next, and for many more years. There may not be time to refurbish a houseboat with three sons, especially when two are toddlers. What will hopefully become clear to him is what Cary and many of the letter writers have already suggested...that his childrens' needs will have to come first, and can't be negotiated.