When you bought your Dodge, you were getting a lousy vehicle at about the same price as the Toyota Sienna or a similar Honda Odyssey.

But you get your peace of mind knowing your Dodge purchase also funded the bloated benefits, private jets, hunting and fishing lodges and big salaries of the big union officials and the workers' monthly checks and benefits who retired a long time ago at the age of 52.

How nice!

And, do not buy an Apple I-phone or I-Pod, whatever you do. You want to listen to music, please buy my Mum's old RCA victrola, OK? I will give you the best price, OK?

While I have your attention, could you please ask Glennn to 'splain how we can redistribute wealth we do not have. I am trying to figgure that out, but it never makes any sense to me.

OK?

You better wash out, my frem. You must loose the sense of fun.

We are only very serious pwogwessives here, who do not take things like state secrets and i-pods and tortured freedom fighters and capitalist exploitation of the workers lightly. We are holding comrad 0baba's feet to the fire, insisting he deliver the hope&change pwogwessive utopia immediately NOW.

What is he waiting for, already? Bring the troops home now, so they can round up all the capitalists.

We don't want WE CAN DO IT to turn out to be WE CAN DO YOU, do we?

Ever since the chosen one, the wunnerful 0, got elected, have you noticed that there is a bull market in taking American hostages?

It's starting to look like Carter all over again. Remember all those Carter hostages?

And, what is 0 doing about it?

It looks like zero {0} to me.

I hate to say it, but Neville Chamberlain would dunk on our wunnerful new Prez.

The whole world is dunking on this dude, and saying 'Chump' to our wunnerful hope&change guy.

It's embarrassing.

Even pwogwessives like Glennn Greenwald are giving him shit.

But you are correct about my mother, who lavished me with Easter baskets until I was 10, and then she suddenly discovered that we were Jewish, and Jews are not supposed to eat Goyisha candy, especially during Pesach, when were not even supposed to eat challa bread, let alone Easter Eggs.

This, according to my research, is one of Glennn's worse problems. His parents gave him Easter Baskets too, and they did it all through his childhood. They tried to hide the Jewish bit. There were no matzas in the Greenwald household, and no Gefilta Fish either, just Easter Eggs and ham sandwiches. Mum and Daddy Greenwald were so into not being Jewish, they were relieved when he came out and told them he was gay.

At least he didn't come out and say he decided to really be Jewish, God forbid.

I want to suggest where you should go on your next vacation, especially if you are an avid star gazer like me.

North Korea is an undiscovered wonderland, especially for leftwing hipster backpackers with pony tails, like you are. It's just like Nepal used to be, dude. There is no light pollution there at night so the stars are quite brilliant. There is no air pollution either, because they have no industry. It's a socialist paradise, dude, where people don't even need to eat or get hungry, because they are just so happy there sharing all their stuff and all.

They won't bother you or take you hostage, dude, even when they see your American passport, especially if you tell them all about how much you liked Pinochet and Che and Mao, dude.

About 200 poor and mostly black kids and their families in Washington, D.C. have just been informed that, no, the private school vouchers they were going to get this fall were not going to happen after all. Suddenly 200 American families who thought maybe at least one of their kids was going to get a ticket out of ignorance and poverty are to be thrown under the bus.

Why is this happening?

What kinda hopium is dat, my frems?

Is the teachers union worse than Al Qaeda?

Hello?

What will you do about it?

Hey Glennn, wake up!

Uncurl yourself from the Brazilian, please, and please do something, OK?

How can 0bie's girls go to that fancy Quaker school while so many others are left behind in the raw sewage of the Washington, DC Public Schools System.

What kinda hopeandchangium is that, my frems?

We are trying to save the world, one child at a time.

In the meantime, you seem content to wait for the teachers unions to magically cleanse themselves of all the corruption, waste and lethargy of our urban school districts.

I hope you are not holding your breath until this magic, hopeandchangium happens, sir.

What is it about you fine pwogwessives which allows you to tolerate and perpetuate horrible school systems in places like Camden and Cleveland?

Aren't the children there getting screwed worse than your dear Taliban and AQ's in Afghanistan?

They are just children. They didn't choose to be born poor right down the street from Nancy Pelosi's coctail parties, did they?