Let's assume that Ms. Dickerson is correct and that African-American lad mags are to blame for obesity among black women. What, on god's green earth, can we do about it?

Would she have us ban these magazines? Institute aversion therapy for black and Hispanic males in the public education system? Start a publicly funded magazine that glamorizes healthier black women? These ideas, as ridiculous as they sound, are the best ones I can envision to solve this problem.

The fact is, it would take one incredibly strong-willed and altruistic MF to change what he is attracted to in order to further public health policy. I firmly believe that you can't help what you love.

This would be a great headline for an article about Michelle Obama: Promising Career as a Hospital Executive Tragically Cut Short By Husband Winning Presidency.

Perhaps my gender blinds me to her misfortune in this situation. If my wife ran for President, and I had to quit my job to go live in the White House and take care of our children, I would view this as a considerable step up from being a hospital executive. The media wouldn't be able to write enough puff pieces about my wardrobe and parenting style to satisfy me at that point. I wouldn't interrupt Barbara Walters to say "That's enough about my wife and her plans to reshape the world as the most prominent person on the planet. Let me tell you about this awesome proposal I drafted while working for the University of Chicago Hospitals..."

The main character of The Graduate seems to pursue Elaine because Mrs. Robinson implies that her daughter is too good for him. I'm not sure if he ever fell for her.

I know you hate the TSA. I'm sorry you are treated the same as the multitudes despite your polyester epaulets. But the TSA is just a show for the public and nothing more. Every person involved in the aviation industry dutifully takes off their shoes and smiles while passing through the checkpoint. I know it makes no sense for flight crews to pass through the same screening as passengers, but it shows the public that TSA is on the case and nobody escapes their scrutiny. It hides the fact that airport security is left up to underpaid government workers.

That's exactly how this country functions...bring on the overbearing, free-spirited characters. It outlines exactly how we would act if only we didn't have to hold down jobs. Duchovny's wooden performance is the beacon to which we all are drawn: we say how we feel, and somehow members of the opposite sex fall like dry timber into our beds after digesting our obvious philosophy. It's great to be an asshole on Showtime; in real life it gets you beaten to death.

Like everything else on TV. Read a book next time.