Strange how rigid and polarized - not to say isolated - sexuality has become over the past 30 years.

I'm a more-or-less straight woman who spent 20 years in a wonderful relationship with a bisexual man. He and I loved each other above all others, although there often were others. It was a challenge, but we always knew that what we shared was far more valuable than what divided us, and when he died 12 years ago, I thought my own life was over.

It seems to me that the most telling detail of the LW's letter is the statement that he "deconverted". From that choice of words, I suspect that the Christian background runs deeper in both LW and his spouse than any love that might hold them together as parents of their son.

It's always seemed to me that there's a continuum of sexual orientation from straight to gay, and where we fall as individuals at any given time is so subjective and based on so many factors that these definitions just don't hold water. But if one has the kind of background and experience that leads one to believe there is something that can be regarded as deconversion, maybe that is also beyond one's grasp.

In my belief system, love is infinite. I also know that, sad as it may be, not everyone has the experience or the ability to grasp that. Too bad for all concerned.

Illness, accident, aging - for whatever reason, we're all only one instant away from the annoying, the disgusting, the grotesque, the unspeakable. The body does indeed betray us, and it's never fair or reasonable. It isn't always pretty, but it's great to hear of people who can still manage to live their lives with those burdens. Best of luck to those who are having to put up with the indignities, and continuing good humor to those spouses and friends who make their lives a little easier.

May Cryofan enjoy the loving minisrations of a ham-handed proctologist when something similar happens to him!

Why do we persist in buying into the myth that the system we have in place is intended to provide health care? It's the American *health-insurance* system.

In this country there may be care for those who have no insurance, but it's catastrophically expensive. Billed costs for specific care are very often cheaper for the insurance company than when it is billed to the uninsured. The costs are controlled by and for the insurance companies, and the object of the system is not to provide the best care to the consumer but to save money and keep it in the hands of the insurance company.

Make no mistake - the Massachusetts system that is so well thought of in some circles does nothing to control the absurd cost of health care. It merely mandates health *insurance* for all. The ultimate beneficiaries of this are, of course, the insurance companies, not the families of Massachsuetts who now have to dig deeper every month to pay this mandatory bill. And - no surprise - the price for "health" insurance in Massachusetts is far higher when compared with other states without this fabulous "system."

I'm married to a wonderful man who clearly has some degree of spatial disorder - and I honestly never even knew there was such a thing until now! To compound the problem, my husband lost an eye several years ago, before we met, which means that such fine motor skills as threading a needle or confidently pouring wine are impossible for him. But in daily life, navigating strange geographies, locating lost items or backing up a car are skills that he finds challenging. When we moved into a rural area, it worried me that he had such a hard time finding his way home. And I certainly never realized that the half-empty coffee cups I find everywhere in the house might be a symptom of something.

By coincidence, I suspect my own spatial orientation is hyper-developed, although that would never have occurred to me until I read this article. I have a very visual memory, can estimate distances with an accuracy that surprises even myself, and getting lost is for me such a rare occasion that I almost treasure that disorientation that is so clearly disturbing to those who suffer from this.

Thank you Sloane Crosley for making this so clear and understandable to one who had absolutely no comprehension of even the existence of such a condition!