My dearest friend divorced a few years ago, after being unhappy in her marriage for several years. She was convinced she would be happier as a single mom. Since then, she has been either dating disastrous guys or trying to find a new guy to date. By her own admission, she isn't any "happier" than she was when she was married, she just has more stress and less financial security.

I share this not to pick on my friend, but to point out that she hadn't figuured out the root of the problem before she got divorced. I'm not saying she should have stayed with her husband, but I think she mistakenly assumed he was the source of all her unhappiness.

I also know from her experience that being a single parent can mean having less free time, less disposable income, and less attention available for one's children and one's self. There is still a household to run, but half the work force, and a significant amount of income, missing from the equation. She says she sometimes feels she is just running in place trying to make ends meet. And she is much lomlier than she was when she was married, even though she felt alone at the time.

Obviously, her story is not the only story out there, and many LWs have shared their positive experiences with divorce. But I think it would be wise to really analyse what life would be lie as a single parent: how would custody, money, time, etc be spent? Would that new arrangement bring you any closer to what you feel is missing right now? And would your potential gain outweigh your kids' losses?

I can't watch the video. I could barely read the synopsis.

But, while I am nauseated and horrified by this "custom," I can fin a sliver of hope: with this captured on video and disseminatd all over the wold, it is difficult to shrug your shoulders and say "Oh, well."

Perhaps, instead of tying foreign aid to whether communities teach abstinance-only, the US could insist that communities treat their women with dignity.

Perhaps, we could insist that we withdraw our troops from a place that defines this monstrous act as an expression of "freedom."

Perhaps, we could educate women around the world that it doesn't have to be this way, that they deserve the right to their own lives.

(And I can't help butsee thje serendipity of this article appearing so soon after that "surrendered wife" garbage a few days ago. This is the end of the surrender road.)

Since maternity care is actually care for the woman's unborn child, I expect the champions of the unborn to be opening their checkbooks posthaste to recitify this problem.

No?

Well, isn't that puzzling.

Anonymous, who stated that my previous post was too simpliistic: I agree, my post is simplistic. I am certainly no policy wonk.

But, the groups that advocate so militantlty against not only abortion, but birth control, sex education and other reproductive rights issues are overly simplistic as well.

The ultimate goal of much anti-abortion legislation givs a woman no choice to not only terminate a pregnancy, but to prevent a pregnancy, even in cases of rape or incest.

The argument (the "trump card" if you will) is the rights of the unborn baby (what others call a fetus).

But, many (not all, I'll grant you, but grant me the "many") of these same advocates are silent on issues of supporting the foster care system, children's health care, and maternity care. They do not follow through with support for the unborn baby, (and of course, the born baby).

If the true motivation is the protection of America's unborn babies, then universal quality prenatal, maternity, and neonatal care should be the top priority of pro-life groups, as well as asafe and healthy foster care and adoption system. Since these issue are rarely mentioned in the pro-life debates, I am skeptical that the right of the unborn are the true motivation of the "pro-life" movement. I expect it has more to do with controling female sexual behavior (though I am not saying that you, anonymous, personally share this view).

Vast amounts of time, money and resourses are spent in preventing abortions. Were the same energy and treasure expended on true care for unborn babies and their mothers, and the young children that were these same unborn babies, I am confident that abortions would be exceedingly rare. And that wouldbe a true "culture of life."