They want to be the region's fourth superpower. First the Ottomans, then the Brits, then US, then Iran. They want control over Iraq the same way that they extend control over Lebanon through Hezbollah and over Syria similarly. The Saudis and Gulf states are very unhappy about that but they're too busy building solid gold 3,000 ft tall hotels. Don't worry Salon, 2012 the latest Iran will achieve political and military supremacy over the whole region and begin to officially spread their Islamic Revolution into neighboring states and the Caucuses. They'd like to see permanent anarchy in Afghanistan so that will remain untouched. But the Jordanian Saudis and Syrian Alawites are finished as are the Kurds. Lebanon will cease to be a single organized political entity around 2013. Iran will see that it is cut up and shared among the Syrian army, who needs it for revenue, and Hezbollah which is looking to create their own quasi-state.

And throw in a picture, for the illiterate.

There that wasn't so hard, was it?

annnny day now. Yeah, really. No really it's a lock. fer sure.

Not in my state. In fact when you go down to DMV the thing you hear most often, shouted as if that makes it more understandable is

"You have-to-bring-an-or-i-gi-nal doc-u-ment from your con-sul-ate or em-bas-see".

one for each of you. something's got to work.

Making threats is part of the game. Apparently though when Iran roars we're not supposed to take it seriously but when we do it's some kind of Golden Rule Inviolate. Iran has stated that they would not be averse to opening some kind of permanent mission in the US. Probably less than an embassy. So given that and given a history of back channel talks about Iraq, what exactly makes you think that no one is talking to one another. Even the Super Evil Kike-istanian Nation, Monster Jewitania, does about $USD400 million in trade with the peace peaceloving Persians of peace each year. So this notion that Iran is a nation full of cotton candy and unicorns and evil bloodsucking Jew/American empire replete with claws and bloody fangs is just waiting, for the opportunity to pounce, kill all the men, impregnate the women and enslave the children is perhaps, wrong.

Obama Uber Alles.

fly a building into some planes. I bet those TSA bastards haven't thought of that.

He Who Is Obama will get your votes no matter what. And you will support Him no matter what His Presidency is. What? You think Personality Cults are for other people?

The connection between stock markets and the economy is as weak as it has always been.

Who are we? Zimbabwe? China? Egypt? You should be ineligible for election if you are older than 60.

It's all about poor black children and nothing else. In fact let's no longer even educate anyone who's NOT poor and black so we have all those extra resources to do what's right. And what's right? Well, making sure the worst students and the worst off and least successful are pulled to the bottom of the middle of the average, of course.

That your replacement will be yet another Kool Aid sipping zomboid hack from the bowels of Salon's political pundits.

So what do you think of this cell phone, and isn't Obama the messiah?

This column, sports and movies and tv will all be gone by Nov.

Sorry but the problem is that they don't make use of what they have. Throwing more dollars at them won't fix it.

1050 class hours a year.

Say it, One thousand fifty class hours a year. That's what your children get. If they went to school like you work their school year would start in Jan and end in May and they would have 7 months off to smoke weed and impregnate one another.

75% of my property taxes go to the schools. The schools in my county have just floated their second billion dollar bond issue this year. Salaries go up 7-10% per year.

Outcomes are exactly the same as 15 years ago. 40% of all students never graduate. And we're #1 in the state.

Maybe you can go to the cinemaaah together. Either that or none of you have kids and don't have the foggiest clue what any average young person would bother to watch. Try

Matilda

James and the Giant Peach

Willy Wonka (the original)

(Do you see the Roald Dahl aspect yet?)

And of course:

The Nightmare Before Christmas

The Great Mouse Detective

Treasure Island (the 1950 version)

Because not only is that lucrative, you can be a beast too.

No really it is. The 'media' doesn't know precisely WHAT to do when black people say vaguely racist things against blacks. It just makes their pointy little heads explode.

You may think they are generally Obamatrons too but so many more of them are older people, often people just looking to cut costs. And, unless you ported a number across from POTS then you generally are not in the pool of robo numbers either.

So there's that...

UPS does this, it saves them bundles. Seriously, plan your route around not making left turns. Why? Because as you sit there growing old and oxidizing waiting for green, your car is getting 0 mpg.

Was there something else or are we done?

It's axiomatic. The point to satirizing Obama is not to satirize Obama. It's to sit back and watch his his dreary neo Beatnik fang gnashing mob of fools go nuclear.

Like at Bonnaroo.

We all up in dat shit like a mufugga no what ahm sane?

What would you witches and crones have to whine and complain about? Why the lack of having something to complain about, of course.

Even though you believe yourselves to be on the bleeding microtome edge of everything, lots regular old Oblamatrons don't really want to pay for cell minutes answering your fool questions. And if they don't then that defines an upscale demographic all on its own.