Letters to the Editor
Malusinka
Published Letters: 368 Editor's Choice: 50
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Don't worry
[Read the article: Isn't 16 a little young for marriage? ]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]At least not about your daughter. Weddings are cool, but I'd bet that watching married life with a teen-aged husband is more likely to make your daughter decide to remain single all her life or wait until she is 40 to marry than to inspire her to follow her cousin's example. Examples of a life you really don't want to be stuck with can be a hell of a lot more powerful than good examples.
And go to that wedding. Smile and hope for the best. Nothing you can do will stop it. And if you're not all that close, you don't know what's really going on. Maybe it's a shotgun marriage and the kids had a lot more freedom from chaperonage than you think. Maybe it's a love match that will endure.
Malusinka
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You have every right to stay, but you want to move
[Read the article: I let my friends stay with me and now they're evicting me!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Despite all the advice telling you to stand your ground, if you do, you will be miserable. Living in disharmony is really stressful.I did that once with a roommate I'd grown to despise. We were both polite, we spent remarkably little time in each other's company considering that we were sharing an apartment. But it was a constant drag on my mood.
Read your lease and make sure your interests are protected. Your friends have proven that you, your happiness, and your money are not a priority. You might have to stick it out to the end of your lease. (That's what I did). It won't be fun.
Oh, and most cities have housing bureaus or other places that give free legal advice. Figuring out your rights and options probably doesn't require paying a lawyer.
Your 'friends' aren't going to move out. Their history (as in having no place to live before they moved in with you) and the current circumstances shows that they are disorganized and thoughtless. Not a fun combination in parents. They are a train crash waiting to happen and you don't want to get caught in the wreckage. As long as you let them, they will probably take advantage of you, not because they are moochers, but because they don't seem to have the money, discipline, stamina etc to cope with their lives. The ability to cope with their lives (like find housing when they need it) will have to come from them. You can't do anything but give them money, which will only delay their transformation into responsible adults or make their irresponsible lives more comfortable for a while).
Pity them and get the hell out.
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I don't get it
[Read the article: I let my friends stay with me and now they're evicting me!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Everyone seems to think that Dad2B and Mom2B are moochers and doing this deliberately. I bet they're just clueless. The baby is a month away (but in reality could come any day) and they are just now thinking about life with baby? Have they bought a crib, changing table, clothes? Have they thought about the fact that the baby will need a mom at home or expensive daycare? It's just now occurring to them that their apartment situation is inadequate.
They're in a panic. They probably mean well, but Mom2B probably can't imagine moving now. And her doctor has almost certainly told her not to lift anything heavy. And let's face it, Mom2B and Dad2B's sofa surfing options are limited.
A due date is really a guess and the baby will be considered full term if it comes 2 weeks early. Once the baby arrives, Mom2B certainly and Dad2B probably will not have the energy to think about apartment hunting. I don't think LW is going to get them out without a court order and bailiff.
LW didn't think about the reality of having a baby around either. That's how he got into this mess. No forethought. Lucky for him, he has no responsibility for this baby. He gets away with the lesson: babies are lots of work.
He's getting screwed, sure. But at least, the lesson he's learning is painless compared to Dad2B who, my guess is, failed to think about contraception one night with Mom2B, because this is not a planned pregnancy.
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Safer? What drugs are you on?
[Read the article: How secure are you? ]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]You write that you suspect we are far safer than we would have been with a bleeding-heart Democrat at the helm.
This is why the US is never going to win the war on terrorism.
Total cluelessness. Before Bush and Abu Ghraib, the US enjoyed a good reputation in the world. Now, its reputation stinks.
Let me ask you one question: Where do enemies come from? The ranks of people who think you mean well or the ranks of people who think you spout hypocritical crap while wanting to exterminate them?
Thanks to Iraq on a pretext, Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo, the Muslim world believes that the US is an enemy. Not because of our Christian background. Not because of our freedom. But because of our actions.
The world is a far less safe place for Americans and it will take generations to heal that. Thank you, President Bush!
You can bet your bottom dollar that I am going to vote for a bleeding heart democrat who believes in human rights and defends their constitutional guarantees.
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Maybe BF and Mom have less at stake
[Read the article: My best friend is now my mom's best friend]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]LW, did it occur to you that maybe one of the reasons your mom and BF get along so well is that neither of them cares as deeply as if it were a real mother-daughter relationship?
Part of your problem with your parents maybe that they are so wrapped up in you as a part of themselves that they can't see straight. They want so badly for you to be happy that they can't let you go to find happiness on your own terms.
My bet is that they are never going to feel that way about BF. And so they can celebrate her happiness without worrying will it last? Is she really happy? Would she be happier if . . .?
They can enjoy her company without drving her crazy. But all because they don't love her in the same way.