Actually, marriage in the western tradition had two purposes. For the propertied classes, marriages were contracted in order to preserve or accrue property. There is no tradition of affectional marriage among the upper classes earlier than about a hundred years ago. For the lower classes, marriage was about procreation, but not love. Most people who got married in the lower classes produced their first child well within the nine month gestation period for humans. Oh, and wives were allowed to slave away at various tasks that men didn't want to do. As long as women could not vote or own property, there was no such thing as marriage as a "relationship." The thing you are trying to preserve is a fantasy. But that's conservatism for you. Conservatives of a hundred years ago didn't want women to vote or own property, either. Once again, you are not making us think. You are making us understand even more profoundly what a shallow grasp you have of history and human nature.

when she was your age. She's alive now, almost ninety. But no one can stand her. Being an alcoholic amounts to having a certain type of personality--narcissistic. AA will help you understand how you seem to others and change. You should go to a few meetings even if you don't want to stop drinking. My mother never understood a thing about herself, and now she wonders why her children avoid her.

of the soul will come no matter what. We can investigate, indict, and incarcerate those who broke the laws, or we can sit on our hands and let those who get away with these things (like Karl Rove) back in power in another four-twelve years, and see what they do then (it will be worse). Either way, it will be painful (I admit that the first way will not be painful for me--I want to seem them humiliated and fried) but if we don't engage now, we will be destroyed the next time. And NO ONE IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD will care.

play with squirrels--when my kid was 141/2, I handed him a few bucks and a bus map of our area (not urban) and I told him to explore. He went out and about for three or four days, learned to take the bus, and got a sense of geography. After that, if he didn't get up in time for the schoolbus, he had to take the public bus. Now he is driving, and his sense of geography and also having had to rely on himself has proven useful. I can't imagine how he might have been prepared for driving without the bus. And walking to and from the bus. At the same time, parenting is full of gambles. Giving them freedom is a gamble, hovering is a gamble. You can only hope that your gamble pays off. I have had five kids and step-kids, the oldest aged thirty. NONE of them has done the risky things their fathers did in the fifties and sixties, and I'm glad they haven't. Moderation and thoughtfulness are the key, not panic.

drive them out! They are walking horrors! I don't even want to spend the money to imprison them.

in response to Waldman in Salon. They were the most vicious anonymous letters I ever saw until Deborah Dickerson started writing for Salon, and they convinced my that Salon readers are the most petty, insulting, self-congratulatory and shallow readers of any online journal, who especially could not (cannot) stand the idea that someone would write an honest, introspective first person piece and GET PAID FOR IT! I mean, posters at the Guardian can be mean, but not nearly as mean as at Salon. I even composed one that I posted for a while as a joke. It said something like, Dear (Author), Why did you bother to write this, you little twit. I am so much wiser and cooler than you, love Salon reader." I think Waldman is pretty brave to reconsider all of this, and do it with a sense of humor. I congratulate her.

I've been in that position. I mean, people decide not to tell you things, lots of people, and they're going to tell her when they know she has cancer? And when they believe that he's found himself a venus flytrap? I mean, I'm not a big fan of EE, actually, but I think you are expecting too much of her, here.

indicate in the article whether the battery is replaceable when it loses its ability to take a charge, or whether th WHOLE THING must be replaced. I have a 10 year old Apple that gets reborn over and over--doesn't have to go to the dump. BUT is very heavy.