Men and women frequently have different priorities. A previous poster mentioned that her husband only cleaned his bathroom once in eight years. This wasn't because he was trying to get her to do it or was too stupid to do it, it's because he didn't care that the bathroom wasn't clean. Likewise a lot of women seem to complain about socks on the floor or a lack of sweeping etc...etc... If you look at "bachelor pads" you'll see that a lot of men don't care that the pizza box sits by the trash for two weeks before it gets taken out. There's no intrinsic value to socks being picked up (In fact excess cleaning has been linked by some studies to increased allergies and reduced ability to handle pathogens among children) before they get plunked in the wash, but an untidy home bothers most women a lot more than it does most men.

What's the solution? Well one fair compromise is to specify exactly what each partner has as a priority and for each to support the other's priorities (Thus the frequently mentioned housework for sex exchange). Another relatively fair compromise is for the partner who cares more about something frivolous to carry more of the load in that area. If you care about a clean floor more than your partner then it's not unreasonable for him to do the sweeping. And if you think your partner would lie to you about his or her priorities in order to get you to shoulder more of the burden then you have picked a lousy mate.

This doesn't apply quite as much to childcare, since obviously there is intrinsic value to children being fed, changed, ferried about, and cared for. On the other hand a lot of women seem to think children need more active care than men think they need. Many men think if you give a kid a toy and he or she is playing with it and you're available to take care of any needs they have, well, you're caring for that child even if you're watching the Lakers game. There's something to be said for this. Many women, suffering from guilt caused by various books and peer pressure, think children need parental attention all the time, and that if you're not reading to a child or hounding him about his homework then you're not caring for him. This isn't fair.

So yes, unpleasant necessary chores like late night feedings and diaper changing should probably be split roughly down the middle absent some other sort of compromise or agreement both partners share. But to expect men to, unbidden, sweep up a little bit of dust on the floor that they don't even notice, well, that seems both unreasonable and a recipe for failure. And if there's a sock on the floor and you want it not to be on the floor so badly that you're willing to fight with or seethe at your husband over it, well, maybe you can put that energy into picking it up and putting it where you want it. Things are never exactly 50-50 and if you care about something so much more than someone else then it's reasonable for you to take more responsibility for it.

The Duggars is a feel good story in the same way that John Carpenter's "The Thing" is, which is to say it's very very creepy. Maybe it's not as bad as this story, but I maintain that the fact that you can AFFORD to recreate a homespun version of the town of Stepford underneath a single roof does not mean you should do so.

A) Men who care about whether a woman has had an abortion are generally being silly, but it's different when you're dating/sleeping with that woman. The only way for a male to control HIS reproductive destiny is through the women he chooses to have sex with. If he would not want a fetus he fathered to be aborted it stands to reason he would not want to have sex with a woman who has had an abortion and considers it not much more than minor knee surgery. Men have opinions on abortion when it comes to their own potential offspring. Since all reasonable people agree that the male has no legal standing when it comes to making decisions around a pregnancy his only means of enforcing his preferences is through his choice of partner. There's nothing wrong with his choosing a partner whose beliefs seem to align with his own. On a personal level I once caused a pregnancy scare where my girlfriend talked about keeping the pregnancy after we'd discussed what we would do and she'd suggested she'd have an abortion (Which I strongly preferred.) She turned out not to be pregnant, but that once was enough for me.

B) It is a bizarre double standard to judge a male for his only OTHER means of controlling his reproductive choices, which is wearing condoms. Even if you trust that your girlfriend is A) faithful (so as to avoid STIs) and B) Is properly administering her own birth control (I'd never date a woman I didn't trust regarding her birth control, but I've dated women absentminded enough to forget sometimes) there's nothing wrong with choosing to take your own precautions. Sex without condoms is riskier than sex with condoms, and both partners should agree to remove rubbers from the equation before they go. 8 months is not that long a period of time. Would you judge a woman for still demanding her partner use condoms after 8 months of dating?

If you said yes and you write for broadsheet I think you're lying.