Maybe your wife doesn't find what's binding you to her quite so unbreakable. Maybe she doesn't want you testing those bonds too much, for fear that they will break and she will float away from you.

The LW's dilemma is: I want my wife to see the other woman as no threat so I can keep fucking her. However my wife *does* see her as a threat, so I have to stop fucking her, except I don't want to.

This sort of proves that the wife is right - the other woman is a threat to your relationship with your wife. If you can't shrug your shoulders and walk away, then this is not a soulless sexual encounter; your reluctance to end it, even in the face of your true love's discomfiture, indicates that you DO have a rather significant budding emotional bond with the other woman. Coupled with sexual infatuation, this can be a one-two punch right in the intimate face of your marriage.

Why on earth did you get married? Marriage is a commitment. The two of you have a somewhat different form of this commitment, that's fine - but your wife is saying 'don't do this thing, it is outside the (very loose) boundaries of our commitment." If you love her, then do that. If you really really really don't want to stop fucking the other woman, then fess up to your wife that you don't really want to put her needs and feelings about your relationship ahead of the newness factor that your dick is currently infatuated with.

If you want to know how to stop seeing the other woman, that's simple. Tell the other woman: I'm no longer interested in you. I've moved on to another casual fling and I don't like to have more than one extra-marital affair at a time. I won't be seeing you anymore, and I've told my wife this, so it might be best if you just cool it on the contact for awhile.

Don't talk about your wife's jealousy - don't make it her problem. Be a man and end it so that the other woman doesn't retain any residual hotness for you. End the affair. The other woman should be just fine with this explanation - she's a free spirit, right?

Clark-Flory posits that Ridley's Washington Post essay also frames the veil as a symbolic rejection of "Western excesses such as binge drinking, casual sex and drug use." OK. Fine. What about Muslim men - how are they symbolically rejecting these excesses? I don't see them walking around in robes and veils, only their eyes peeping out.

Ridley being grateful for the veil shielding her from catcalling louts is another version of the prisoner embracing his chains. How about if the strict laws were directed at men for catcalling, instead of at women for being, well, women?

Imagine a world where morality police stopped men from gathering in groups, arrested any who spoke to women without being spoken to first, beat those who whistled and catcalled. Imagine a world where men were nervous about doing or saying anything offensive to women.

It's so much easier to imagine a world where the morality police enusre women are cloaked like black ghosts so that men don't have to police themselves.

By the way - doing a 360 means you end up where you started, no change in attitude. A 180 is a reversal.

...as long as you learn something from the experience, i.e. don't continue to make the same choices that made you feel bad.

Men can't stand the idea of competition. A woman's sexual past is competition, pure and simple. Is my dick as long? Hard? Attractive? Am I less skilled, exciting, knowledgeable? They can't face this competition down and defeat it - it's in the past, faceless, ephemeral. How can a guy compete with a woman's memory of a better night of sex? Erego, they don't want to know about it.

Women don't have to lie about their number of partners. They should just refuse to discuss it. It's no one's business. The only answer needed is: I"ve had at least one partner before you, I've been tested, I'm STD free....and now I'm all yours!

I would never lie about my number of partners - because I would never give that detail. It's personal. Yes, there have been a few encounters I've regretted. I've learned something from that sickish feeling you have the next day - anyone know that feeling? But that was *my* lesson. And *my* experience. And no one should get to sit in judgement on it based on some stupid double-standard number-of-partners 'norm'. Least of all me.

imagine her afterwards, reclining against the headboard sharing a cigarette with mr. big-unit, thinking 'i guess i love my husband, but SHIT!'

I'd invite you to share a cigarette but I'm picturing my boyfriend leaning against Pamela Anderson Lee's headboard saying "i love my girlfriend but oh. my. gawd" so I'll just say, that was really fucking *funny*.