When talking about VAT... I grew up in a European country where we had one of those. Sure the taxes were high because we had all the other taxes a well (income, property, etc)

But, the idea was sound: the VAT tax was different depending on what it applied to. Food had the lowest tax (appr. 6%) then there were separate category for clothing and household necessities,the rest, and an 8% luxury tax on anything above a certain value (excluding housing) A 'normal' car would be taxed at 25% but a luxury model would be 33% Something like that would instantly reduce the need for Ferraris, Bentleys, Roll Royces, Aston Martins, high end Mercedes, BMW, and Audi brands, or at least make the people who can afford them pay extra.

Now I don't agree with high rates for VAT, but if you kept them all 'reasonable' it could be workable, provided you also eliminate income taxes on any income that constitutes 2 or 3 x poverty level as defined by the Federal government.

I feel that the ceiling on SS taxes should be eliminated. It would make sure that CEO's and upper management pay their fair share of the SS burden. That will go a long ways towards offering universal healthcare coverage to all.

In regards to universal healthcare, it should NOT be a welfare program. In my opinion, even the poorest would have a co-pay. Allowing people who can't afford healthcare to walk into a emergency rooms and failing to pay for their healthcare can no longer be acceptable.

People who complain that poor people shouldn't have to pay $5-10 dollars to see a doctor, should take into account that that same 'poor' person probably has at least 1 TV, cable, a cellphone, a car, and many more items considered to be 'needs' but really fit in the 'want' category.

It's all about choices and sometimes we definitely confuse what our needs are with what our wants are. If health care is considered a 'need' that everybody is entitled to, then it only seems fair that some of the 'wants' may have to be sacrificed by those who 'need' it.

I posted earlier and wanted to add something the LW should definitely be asking herself, since she's considering marriage...

Would you want the man, you claim to love, be the father of your future children? You already know that he does not care about his current child. That will not change 'just' because you'll be the mother. Are you willing to gamble that he 'might' improve?

Or, are you considering to remain childless yourself? Which would make sense from your impatience expressed in your letter.

Raising any child - regardless of (dis)ability - is time consuming and takes a lot of patience. A lot of the things you describe and take for granted as 'common sense', need modeling and consistency. Anna has had none, and you haven't been willing to be the role model.

It seems to be that everybody is assuming that the father will start taking care of his daughter, once he's reminded to do so. From reading the story I'd think that he hasn't shown any real interest in being involved with his daughter. What makes people think that all of a sudden, by the mere mention that he 'should' be taking care of his daughter and getting involved in her life he'll see the light and instantly change his ways.

The advice given sounds good, about the woman having to make a decision to back out of the relationship, if she's unwilling to take care of the daughter. I'm a little worried that the boyfriend/father to Anna will rebound to another woman to fill the void in his life, and the story will start all over again.

I agree with the commenter who says that you can not fake love for someone else's child Personally I'm happily married, and also have a 16-year old step-daughter, whom I consider no different that if she was my very own daughter. As a matter of fact, I don't even use the 'step'part when introducing her to people; she's my daughter. Anybody who knows me is aware that I love her very much and that I'm very proud of her.

It would take a lot of counseling for the writer to shed herself of all the resentment built up over the last 4 years, observing Anna growing up. The writer, being 29, seems to have a very short memory; already having forgotten about being a teenager herself. I have to say that the writer's mother did a pretty good job raising her; after all she raised her in such a way that the writer takes credit for everything she knows, not realizing that her mother was the teacher. As it has been pointed out, Anna did not have that benefit, and I fault the father for not having stepped into that role, and instead having 'shipped' her off to a nanny.

It's a sad story, but my advice would be to have Anna evaluated by a child psychologist. It is not too late to intervene. With proper guidance Anna may very well still turn out to be a well-adjusted adult - just a little later than expected.