You wrote:

My grandma is still waiting to come home. My parents still tell her she will. Meantime, they have bought a new Cadillac and a houseful of furniture and guess where the money came from?

Tinwoman, you should let the nursing home know what is going on. When the money runs out, and she is still in that home, the nursing home is going to sue your grandmother AND your parents. Medicaid isn't going cover the amounts your parents are stealing. Nursing homes cost between $100K-300K per year.

You should talk to your grandmother, if she is still clear-headed, about revoking the power of attorney and naming you as her attorney in fact. If you can have the responsibility of writing that check out each month and keeping the rest of her money safe for future needs.

I am sure you don't want to see a big drawn out legal war in your family but understand that your parents are driving that Cadillac right to the courthouse.

I am just going to chime in with the common wisdom here.

Just be the guy's girlfriend if you enjoy being with him. If you fear you will see less of him when he starts working this position-- well, see how that goes before you move in.

If he wants you to be a surrogate mom to his kid, let him buy you a ring and do it properly.

You don't want to move in, let the kid form an attachment to you and then when the relationship isn't what you bargained for, leave and then the kid is abandoned a second time.

Your guy is looking for an easy solution to a problem that is way more complex than he wants to admit.

I don't think you are being selfish for wanting to stick to your routine at the age of 23-- by not getting pregnant at 16 you earned yourself the right to live free at the age of 23.

Don't take this on. What if you yourself get pregnant during this little houseplay episode? What then of your future, career, dreams?

Just be his girlfriend for now-- if that is not enough for him let him ask you for a real commitment the right way so you can know exactly what you are getting into.

Okay, I will bite. If the genders were reversed, it would still be a bad idea. Because then the poor kid would be getting a drifty non-committal live-in pseudo "step dad" who resents his presence and the kid would be at a significantly higher risk of being abused and neglected. It doesn't matter the gender.

I don't think anyone is disagreeing with your sentiments that the 9 year old stands to lose the most in this lose-lose scenario.

But even if the LW is a self-absorbed twit--(personally, I think that most 23 year olds are self-absorbed, but she doesn't appear to be a "twit"-- she seems thoughtful, intelligent and fully aware of her moral and emotional limitations) that doesn't change the fact that this move is not in the LW's best interests, either and the posters who appeal to the LW's self-interest are going to have the best chance of convincing the LW to seek shelter elsewhere.

I think by "wrapping it up"-- she meant he should have worn a condom.

But whatever. It took me awhile to figure that one out.

This reminds me of Juno-- the quirky little sarcastic/ironic statements from a person with virtually nil life experience. She probably doesn't have any idea how offensive her statements about the child come off to parents.

I think that is why the LW is pushing the buttons of so many parents on the board.

Anyone remember the scene in Juno when Juno is meeting with the adoptive parents for the first time and makes infertile Vanessa cringe by saying "at least you don't have to carry it...."

Set your clocks twenty minutes early.

Stop drinking caffeinated drinks after four pm.

Limit yourself to no more than one alcoholic drink at dinner on nights before work.

Don't smoke pot at all the nights before work.

Don't use any drugs harder than pot and alcohol, period.

F'ing Hilarious.

Thanks for sharing.

Five minutes of my life I will never get back.

Cintra-- you are stooping as low as Gary Kamiya.

Why not just cut through the colorful anologies-- domintrax, centerfold...

WHY? Why not just embrace your inner 13 year old and stick to the message and just call her a "slut." Real mature, truly enlightened discourse here.

I am a pro-choice democrat, a woman, someone who voted for Hillary in the primary and will vote for Obama in the general election.

I think that Palin's conservative platform is horrifying.

Cintra-- your op/ed would have been enough without all of the sexist analogies. SO uncalled for, so catty and unneccessary.