I am guessing these people are old-skool Catholics of the Mel Gibson variety. I come from a Catholic upbringing and community and mostly the people there are cafeteria Catholics. The die-hard faithful around here break away and become non-denominational born-agains.

Anyhow, consider googling Center For Inquiry, perhaps you can find some like-minded people in your community. Consider yourself a "secular humanist," or "humanist" which has less bite then "atheist." (Devout religious types are often taught to beleive that atheist = satanist, so you really don't want to throw that label on yourself too quickly depending on how ignorant your inlaws are).

What many devout Catholics do respect is a skeptism toward clergy. If you are pressured to attend Mass and wish to abstain, acceptable reasons to do so include a sense of cyncism or vague offense("they're always asking for money," or "father so-and-so really offended me during my pre-cana when he said some things that were just extremely judgmental and uncalled for.")

You don't have to go into detail or argue. With your son, raise him Catholic and simultaneously undermine any dogmatism as best you can. Make sure he learns about science, then encourage him to read the bible himself (which Catholics are not encouraged to do themeselves) and draw his own conclusions as to whether it could possibly be considered factually accurate or truthful, and whether it is necessary to have the Catholic Church interpret the Bible on his behalf.

Good luck. Hang in there and seek some friends beyond your husband's family. Love them, and imagine how it might have been had you been raised in the family and then lost your faith. There may even be some silent doubters within the ranks of your inlaws, time and patience may reveal you are not so alone.

LW-- your friends just haven't met the right guy for them. They will meet their guy when the time is right and in the meantime, they should concentrate on their own goals.

Many of my dearest friends settled down and married (their high school sweethearts) in their early twenties and I did not. I broke up with the highschool boyfriend, later I broke up with the college boyfriend. I continued going out, dating, not dating, having crushes, breaking some hearts and letting my heart get broken.

My married friends tired of what they viewed as unrelenting, immature, drama and were no longer receptive to hearing me discuss the ups and downs of my dating life. Essentially I was given the message, I was "too picky" and don't bother us with any of these stories until you find "the one."

I found new friends to hang with for social purposes but still kept in touch with my married friends as best I could considering they barely ever went out anymore. We talked about serious issues and the local news and their marriages and their kids and I didn't lean on them for any heartbreak drama but I did share some of the funnier anecdotes from single life.

Later when I did find "the one" and get married, my married friends, my guy and I could do couple things together like we did back in high school.

The truth was, as picky as I was, my guy meets my checklist. Not all of the items on my checklist were superficial. He is good looking, but he is also family oriented, smart, progressive, funny, professional, irreverant, driven. Why is that ever too much to ask for in a partner? He isn't perfect and neither am I. I never thought I was perfect. I just didn't get serious until I met the right guy for me.

You are holding your romantic situation out as the gold standard. Your friends might not meet their husbands until they are in the late twenties or thirties. It doesn't mean they are desperate. But watching ones friends settle down and then pressure one to do the same can certainly make one feel desperate.

Can you be friends with your single friends without jeopardizing your relationship with your boyfriend/fiance? Can you find things to do with the girls that don't involve hunting/trolling for men? I.e., go paint some pottery or go rollerblading together and talk about the non-romantic issues dear to your hearts.

Don't pressure your girlfriends to lower their standards (friend 2) or their defenses (friend 1). They have all the time in the world to sort out their love lives. Just be friends with them as they are and change the subject when they ask why they haven't (yet) landed that man.