We live in the personal player age....mp3's, ipod's, et cetera. So why on earth do I need to have blaring over the p.a. system at the gym the whole time? Fear of silence and fear of offending the two or three people there without mp3 players is what drives it.

In fact, that one thing, that one seemingly little thing has made me so nuts that I have considered starting my own gym, with a strict policy against playing music over the p.a.

I don't want to go to the gym at all because of it. I complained once and the manager said "It is more for the employees than the guests" and I said "Why can't they just have it play at the front desk then?" She looked at me like I was crazy.

The real problem here is not that the young man will not leave home, it is the fact that she allowed him to move back in in the first place without any ground rules.

If she were the caring and responsible woman she claims to be, she would have told him upon his return: "You have to pay your share, buy your food, and have plan to be out in (say) 3 months".

Had she done that, there would be no problem. Instead, she is blaming him, and playing victim. I mean really, the whole thing about supporting him when she is on social security? Gimme a break. What a pity party.

First, she needs to get over herself, next she needs to admit she is also to blame.

Cary got it wrong...

The actual "Can't stand" selection is "I can't stand: Poor Hygiene...

I can't stand someone who is not clean."

I think it is fine that according to the woman who wrote in that 60% of men say this. I have personally dated women who are not very hygienic. And I am sure every woman out there has dated guys who are pretty dirty too.

When a man imagines his ideal woman, I would bet dollars to donuts that he imagines her just bathed, fresh as a daisy, soft and powdered. Seldom does a guy imagine her just coming in from a three-week camping trip, ripe as last weeks dirty laundry.

Does that mean he doesn't like oral sex? I think that is a bizarre extrapolation, personally. (By the way, every guy I know totally digs oral sex.)

So....it seems the onus is more on the letter-writer than guys as a whole...at least 60% of them. Rather than imagining the possibilities of what it could possibly mean, perhaps she should just accept it and move on.

Hi.

I sell organic wine for a living. I am a trained sommelier.

About 70% of what I sell regularly is wine which contains little to no detectable sulfites. All the wine I sell is made at the very least, with organically grown grapes. A fraction of these wines are produced biodynamically.

Here is the thing: The science as to how sulfites affect people is fairly controversial in my circle of associates. So, let's just say this: like all wine, conventional or organically produced, there is good, and bad wine.

To say the wine is bad because it is organic is foolish. Wine is bad because of one (or all) of three things: poorly sourced grapes, poorly crafted, poorly stored. Wine that is made without added sulfites does tend to be less stable than wine made with added sulfites. However, there are amazing sulfite free wines. Pick up any sulfite-free wine from Stellar Organics, out of South Africa. These are really good wines, with no detectable sulfites, that are true to the varietal. Every single buyer who has tasted them has been blown away.

Lesser-known, but very amazing, is Casa Barranca's Arts and Crafts Red, also sulfite free. Like good pizza, this wine actually tasted better the next day, which is saying a lot for most wines, and completely amazing for sulfite-free wine.

My final points are:

1) It so happens that much of the worlds most highly-regarded and highly-coveted wines happen to be made from organically and biodynamically grown grapes.

2) Another consideration is wines that are not made with any sort of organic oversight are often full of additives. Many wine producers are not above adding glycerin, flavoring and other additives to maintain consistency and quality, let alone sulphur dioxide.

So, to make a distinction between organic and non-organic wine as good vs. bad is unfair. There are great wines on both sides, and there are some truly horrible wines from both sides too.

But the only way to find out what you really enjoy is to get out there and try, try, try!

Cheers.

THANK YOU!

For months I have been trying to articulate to people how it is, raising a kid, being a single dad, and being basically unable to date.

Thank you for putting it out there. I can't wait to read the book.

Hallelujah!

...threw up in my mouth a little bit reading that.

This essay reveals Ms. Bird to be one of the more obnoxiously self-obsessed writers I have had the displeasure of reading recently.

How tiresome.