I'm so struck by the LW drawing the connection to 9-11. I knew my problems started that year, some other things also happened (my father passed away as did a close friend, I had a romantic breakup), but since that day in New York, I've been a mess. I worked in what my small city would call a highrise (I'm a former New Yorker, used to work right next to the Towers); that year I was only on the 24th floor and a thousand miles away; but after 9-11, every time there would be a sudden noise -- even a printer starting up -- I would have a huge panic attack. There were small fires occasionally in the building (popcorn left in a microwave) and a lot of false alarms caused by construction dust, etc. since 2001. Each time the alarm siren would go off I would panic, fly down the stairs, heart racing, and dread going back, while everyone else moseyed around (generally didn't even leave their desks) and gave me "what's with her?" looks. Finally I started coming in later and sneaking out early, got a worse and worse attitude and like the LW I also lost my job, which was a huge deal since I'm in my late 50s and haven't been able to get another one in the field I've worked in for over 30 years (probably bad references, plus I've been told in interviews I come off as "nervous"; of course subconsciously I don't WANT to work in a highrise again, even a small one). So I have no job, and no insurance, and am living off my IRA which will be gone after not much longer.

I was already a recovering alcoholic; so instead of booze, I started eating ice cream. Then I tried switching to dark chocolate, mac & cheese, spicy potato chips; nothing helped, everything (of course) piled on the pounds. I kidded myself that since I also ate organic salads I was okay; I work but it's freelance typing at home so I do that all night, then lie in bed most of the day, getting fatter and fatter, with no exercise except walking my dog around the block; I used to be attractive, now I'm 30 pounds overweight and look terrible in pictures; even my friends politely mention my weight regularly; I have also developed diabetes (Type 2) have high "bad" cholesterol, and extremely high blood pressure. I have low thyroid as well but the pills for that make me nervous so I don't take them. I lie to my doctors about my self-care and what I'm doing to get better. Right now I'm on 5 prescribed medications altogether and rarely, if ever, exercise even though I have a treadmill and have paid for yoga classes which I love but feel too "tired" (from blood pressure meds, which I do take) to go to them.

I "dwell on" 9-11 and watch documentaries about it every chance I get; I did NOT lose a close friend (that I know of) or family member in the Towers, and growing up a New Yorker, even though I now live far away, I felt deeply affected but assumed everyone else did too, and that the feelings would pass. They haven't.

I've been to therapists as well but hadn't, until this LW connected the dots so clearly, traced back my freakouts specifically to 9-11. I do think (now that I read his letter) I probably also have PTSD, as a direct result, even though I feel self-conscious saying that since others had losses which were much deeper and closer. I did watch the Towers fall "live" on TV as so many of us did. It occurs to me there may be an actual "9-11 Syndrome" since it is true that nothing like it has happened before, in "our" culture -- so who knows how deeply we've all been affected. I never felt unsafe in an office before and now I'm terrified to be in one.

Meanwhile Cary's response about drinking specifically was excellent, true, accurate, thoughtful and very well done in terms of preserving the dignity and anonymity of whatever path he is on (ahem) and at the same time genuinely offering help to the sufferer. Kudos to Cary for that. I do think what he suggests is very helpful AND treatment specifically (perhaps) for PTSD might also be appropriate and helpful to the LW.

In my recovery from drinking, several years before 9-11, I was helped by a program, very much; I still would recommend, and believe it is the best if not the only help, for that particular issue; since we all have to eat, food problems are more complex and in my own case I went to a meeting for people with eating issues and it didn't help. I think now that as others have thoughtfully written, I should investigate PTSD as a cause, and thanks to the boards for the suggestion.