And some people want to love an idea.

Looks like this guy wants an idea for a girlfriend (the "pure" woman). She can never live up to that, because she is a person, neither pure or unpure.

Seems like a dead-end relationship. Maybe he needs to buy himself a Real Doll - just not a used one.

Clearly Ann Bauer is no foodie - but her well-written outsider's take on the "foodie" culture creates an interesting picture of a group of people whose interests and behaviors are somewhat inscrutable to the rest of us. Foodies are like any group of absorbed fans - Trekkies, Scrapbookers, Socialites, ESPN addicts, etc, who engage in a pastime that seems shallow and uniteresting on the outside, but provides them with plenty of fun to fill up their free time.

Personally, I would rather read one of her interviews with organic produce farmers or playwrights than any of the "food porn" she so eloquently describes. Salon, why don't you publish those? Instead of writing melodramatic, self-referential articles about the difficulty of being a journalist or a writer, give us the work products of journalism and writing. Give us less autobiography and more narrative!

Some friends of mine purchased a house and proceeded to tear out bathrooms and walls. Each time they would fix something up, something else would be wrong, and they would tear down two things. The renovations began to take on epic proportions, such that there was always something to be done, some room that wasn't finished and wouldn't be for a long time.

They didn't complete their renovations until they had to move. With all the stuff out of the house, her husband was able to take three months and just work on the house. They didn't worry about it being perfect, they just worried about being done. Within a month, the place was transformed - rooms were complete, new paint was there, the kitchen was redone, and the batrhoom, which had been unusable for the whole three years they lived there, finally had a shower and a sink. It was amazing. But oh, they were not able to ejoy it.

So my advice? Close the door on the rooms that "could" be fixed up, and work on a small bit at a time, so that at least some of the time you'll be living in your house instead of in a construction zone. Old houses have cracks in the paint sometimes. Don't worry about it. Take time to relax.

Thank you so much for posting this today. And thanks to Riverbend for her words, for putting a face and a memory to the interpreter who was killed in this kidnapping.

Outsourcing creates jobs in the US because most of the time, the people who do the outsourcing have no idea how to run a project with remote resources. They get it wrong, there are misunderstandings, and then they have to hire expensive consultants to fix the problem. Presto, job creation!

My friend recently completed law school, and is in the process of finishing his first, grueling year. As part of the job, he was required to create for himself the appearance of being a "lawyer" - including the purchase of very expensive clothing, electronics and other trappings. He now goes to lawyer functions, which are usually of the $12-martini kind. And he is required to work ridiculously long hours - because his firm rates him on the time he bills, which must be 40 hours a week, not counting lunch, writing email to friends, going to the bathroom, and finding new projects to which he can bill.

There's this saying that the more money you make, the more money you need to spend. It's always possible to spend MORE money on the trappings of a profession or a lifestyle.

And the money my friend earns now is certainly not sufficient to afford him the trappings of an experienced, successful lawyer. That will take time, prudence, and patience. In the meantime, he has to appear successful, poised and confident, even if he can't afford the $40k Lexus.

Cary's advice was pretty good - they need to talk about what is causing his stress, and what will alleviate it - without assuming that it's just the income at issue. For if she goes forth and gets the high-paying editor job, the advertising executive job, it will require MORE money to appear to fit into that status. More power suits, more cars, boats, and psychotherapy.

They both need to make sure that their goal in life is clear, and more tangible than "to have enough money". They need to define what "enough" means, and how much they are both willing to sacrifice for it.