Letters to the Editor
elbel
Published Letters: 8 Editor's Choice: 4
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Anyone want to start a collection...
[Read the article: Home-decorating dreams?]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]...to include a copy of _The Feminine Mystique_ with every playhouse that gets sold?
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Could be depression. Also pick up some anti-procrastination skills.
[Read the article: Help! I'm committing professional suicide!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]For me, procrastination is a coping mechanism (an unhealthy / self-destructive one) that has come up at several points in my life.
1: College, major I hated. Would not just sit down and do the work. Mild depression. After almost failing out my freshman year and nearly losing my academic scholarship, I went on meds to quickly stabilize myself. Over the next year or so, I switched majors, developed healthier habits (yoga 2x week, more water, more sleep), saw a school counselor, and got off the meds. You might consider meds to get you steady in the short term, while you figure out what's really wrong.
2: Recently. Totally burned out of my job, to the point where I almost hated my profession. I hated doing anything. I went on leave for a couple of months and then switched to a totally different division of my company, doing the same thing. Love my job again. Looking for a new job sucks, but maybe you should find a different company, or find a position in your current company that suits you better.
Finally, you may need some additional coping mechanisms for overcoming the habits of procrastination. I recommend two books on productivity that a lot of people at my company have read & really like: Getting Things Done by Paul Allen, and Never Check Email In The Morning by Julie Morgenstern.
Allen's book teaches you the skill of breaking down projects into minute, concrete steps & how to identify the true starting point. For example, "Call to confirm printing" may actually require you to check with 3 designers, make sure you have the most up to date deliverable, talk to the other marketing person to get the address of the conference where you need the materials shipped, arrange a special deal with FedEx to get things shipped correctly, look up the right Pantone color that the printer needed, find the printer's number, and then finally actually make the call.
Morgenstern's book has similar coping techniques, and she's also a consultant who helps people like you to prioritize their tasks to maximize value to the company.
My own personal additional coping technique: Get content blocking software on your computer! I am also a "creative" type -- I'm an interaction designer. Often I find myself procrastinating (going to Salon, *cough*) when I have to make a complicated decision & don't quite feel like getting lost in my work. The best thing I've done for myself is install content blocking software on my computers at work. I block my problem sites -- news, shopping, email, IM, etc. -- for most of the day. (I give myself a half hour at lunch, which has the added benefit of making me quickly process all of my personal email and online chores, without dawdling.) You may just find that you have nothing left to do BUT work!
Good luck!
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Problems? Solutions.
[Read the article: I'm living in filth!]
[Read more letters about this article: Here]Problem: Social reciprocation impossible.
Solution: Have a picnic. Go to the beach. Take friends to a museum or to a performance in the park or out to a bar.
Problem: Dogs aren't trained well.
Solution: Train them. As others have mentioned, you have to get the smell out of the house. My trainer recommended Nature's Miracle, which I use. Something like OxyClean, which is very good at breaking down biological stuff, may also work.
To better-train the dogs, agree with the person who emphasized that the dogs need to be on a very regular schedule. In addition, whenever you get ready to take the dogs out, have them lie down by the door. Then say "Let's go potty" (or whatever) and take them outside. (That way they have a gesture -- lying down by the door -- that they associate with going outside; eventually they'll be able to tell you they want to go out with this gesture.) Bring treats with you, and when a dog does its business, say "GOOD potty! Good fido!" and give it a treat & some attention. This will help reinforce to the dogs that potty happens outside.
If you are still worried about the dogs' marking, then confine the dogs to a carpet-less portion of the house when you leave (like the kitchen or bathroom, if it's big enough). Get dog crates that they go into when you're gone.
Personally I think it's a bit insane to have 3 dogs at your age, but that's your call...
Problem: Carpet is gross.
Solution: Replace the flooring. Check the laws, but landlords should know that carpets go bad very fast. If the dogs are in the apartment illegally, you do have a problem, but coming clean earlier rather than later is the best way to mitigate the damages. Ultimately the most you should have to pay is to replace everything.
Your landlord will try to get as much from you as humanly possible. That's what they do. Know your rights -- if there's a tenant association where you live, contact them first.
I wouldn't even bother to clean the carpet -- having it done professionally will be $100 - $200 depending on where you live; renting a steamer is not much cheaper and it's sucky work. It's so hard to properly clean a carpet if you're experienced that it may just make you feel worse!
You may want to propose to your landlord that they replace the carpet with Pergo or something more durable & just as cheap. It may cost slightly more up front (but not much, I just remodeled and it's about the same) but the landlord will have to replace it much less frequently. Then you won't have to worry.
Good luck. And don't worry too much. At worst this problem has a price tag and will be solved by money.