If she was keeping sexually explicit pictures, well, I don't know what to make of that. But, I keep pictures of the cotillions and balls I used to go to back when I was dating midshipmen. Pictures from my youth are important to me, and I have shared those pictures with my significant other. They are memories of, geez, I don't know, youth, innocence, health.

However, either way, I suspect the relationship with this woman is over. Cary's right - you have to tell her. Please learn an important lesson from this for your next relationship. Those momentos meant something to her, what you should have done was ask her to share her momentos with you. You might have learned something important about her, what she felt when the pictures were taken, etc. and strenthened your relationship.

Sorry dude,

Unix

Well said, Cary! But, LW, do be careful. 30 days isn't long, and, unfortunatekly, this man may be interested in taking advantage of you sexually at some point. There is a lot of that sort of thing that happens in AA, Keep going one day at a time...

Annie Orchids, thankful to my HP for the gift of nearly 13 years of continuous sobriety...

My former husband loved the tv and his computer. I used to just about beg him to stop and do things with me, maybe a hike, going to local fireworks, cooking, all kinds of things.

Eventually I stopped asking, and discovered I was fine doing those things alone. Then I found someone who did like to do those things with me.

After our divorce, David got the tv and the computer, and I hope he is still happy with both devices.

Annie

Hey anybody see those Lockheed ads, "We never forget who we are working for" hundreds of us - me too - have been laid off. But they increase the off-shore hiring, and the place I left was hiring more Indians on worker visas - much cheaper than the American people.

...I think what GK was talking about when he said young people was not children for Pete's sake, but young adults. Don't any of you 40+ somethings work at places with 20 somethings? The 20 year old still have their hope and optimistic outlook. They haven't realized yet that their careers will probably suck, that they can't change the world, or much of anything, and that life has a lot more disappointment than anything else. Being around 20 somethings is like being around...I dunno, puppies. Young people are fun to listen to - and I hope some of them do really do have good lives of love and happiness. But they probably won't.

...why when it comes to abortion, a woman has the right to choose weather or not to carry the child to term because it is her body. But, you can't sell one of your own body parts. I'd love to sell one of my kidneys so I could go to school full time, but that would be illegal, although it is my body. If the practice was regulated to make sure there was no coercion, then there would be no black market, no people flying to places like China to get supposedly 'donated' organs from recently executed prisoners, and life would be better for so many people.

Dear LW,

I have to agree with Claudia. I met my BF when I was undergoing cancer treatment, and I thought he was very noble, etc., to date someone dealing with cancer, was already bald and wore wigs etc. And like you I had the weight gain. He told me that when he kissed me I tasted very bitter, almost acidic. Later I found out that he got quite a bit of mileage for being 'such a compassionate person' dating a cancer patient. After that novelty wore off, he hit the internet to find my replacement.

I hate to admit it, but Claudia's right LW. Make sure you have all your finances, etc., together, your relationship might not last. What is the saying, hope for the best, prepare for the worst?

Hey look at John Edwards. With a Presidential nomination to lose, he couldn't even keep his in his pants until his wife Elizabeth passed away.

Hang in there, my hopes for you to make remission,

A cancer survivor so far

..is still okay with his Catholicism. That faith (from a former parochial school grad) benefits only men,and is about men getting power more than anything else.

..the singers are all quite thin too, no?

My best wishes to you Cary - I know sometimes I am hard on you, but I love you too - as I am sure many of us.

LW - I used to be angry like you, then someone said to me, "You can't trust a blind man with one leg to carry you up a mountain, no matter how much he wants to". You can trust some people with your life, some people with certain secrets, but not others. Don't ever trust anyone with your money.

Don't expect one person to be the person you can trust with everything, that just doesn't exist.