Sureok, I'm not blaming the Boomers for any of the things I listed, because I don't think that's fair. The disappointment and anger that one generation feels toward another has so much to do with children realizing that their parents aren't perfect and parents realizing that their children have not granted them immortality and are not in fact a younger reflection of themselves (at least, not in the way they would like). That realization, experienced often as a sense of betrayal, exists in every relationship. I can see where the Boomer generation has missed the mark, but I can also see the wonderful things they have contributed to my country; both are true.

I was just pointing out that, while our experience may seem like apples and oranges, the weight of our struggles is the same, and we do a disservice to one another when we suggest otherwise. Your post sounded to me like it was indeed suggesting otherwise, but I recognize that I may have misread.

I agree that this is a situation where folks need to get out of their heads and into their bodies/lives/experiences. Theological arguments, political arguments -- these are valuable things but sometimes they are a distraction from just being who and where you are in the moment. I'm almost tempted to suggest they go to a petting zoo or something like that. When you can't get along because you each take yourselves and your ideas maybe a tad bit too seriously, it's time to do a little pennace by engaging something really silly. Try caring about your theological differences whilst petting a pony. I dare you.

Someitmes, when someone is so stuck in their relationship to others due to ideas and idologies, my first instinct is to wonder what it is about the rest of their selves they feel uncomfortable or unable to bring to the relationship. In this case, there's something more than a little bit strained about the triangle created between husband, wife, and mother-in-law, with the husband in the position of defining, explaining, and defending his wife to his mother. I'd suggest that the LW ask of herself why such an arrangement occurred, and whether the religious debate was the cause of the arrangement or merely a catalyst or cover for it. Our old saws about wife vs mother-in-law warfare belong to that class of cliche that exists because it has an element of truth. How different is this situation, really, from other wife/mother-in-law conflicts that occur in many marriages?

One small side note -- I actually think church does not have to be dull. And it's also not always just about ideas and ideologies: There's a lot of the body and the heart involved in speaking together and singing together and eating together - oh so very often - disagreeing with each other, a bunch of people who showed up on a given morning more or less randomly and often with very different ways of thinking, living, and acting in the world. Some people find that dull. Myself, I'm not such a fan of surfing.

I also, on the other hand, don't think that church services, or any other religious services, are necessary on some fundamental level, as Cary seems to be saying in his response. I don't think they have to be necessary - they're just a source of joy for some, comfort for others, control and power for a few (though a few too many), and sometimes even doubt, dissent, and growth. As the LW, with her UU background, most likely is aware.

my husband is quitting his job to take care of the kids.

she needs some real ideas to go with the style (because enough people either like or are willing to ignore the style part). Even Bush in 2000 had some ideas. What she has is things she is against. Even now, her interviews seem to be rotating around some central point about cowardly McCain staffers or lazy bloggers. She can't seem to get off the Irate Talk Express. That does not win national elections. I don't know if that is due to the public having some degree of discernment when it comes to the presidency or the fact that it is hard to attract the kind of competent staff people who you need to support you in order to win an election when you have nothing to excite them in any sustainable way. What I do know is that folks get tired of that after a while, and four years is a very long time to have to listen to all the people who aren't being nice enough to Sarah Palin.

I don't know if she can get it together in 4 years. But I cringe every time I hear "yay let her run that means Dems are sure to win!" Can't tell you how many times I heard that about Bush in 2000.

Is soo going to be the name of my next punk band.